What are things you do NOT NEED from family or friends?

I know this is a wierd post, but I feel I need to vent and would like to hear what others have to say (if you feel like posting).

I do not need:
my family doing things for me that I don't need them to, just so they could have something to throw in me face later

my family denying to my face how much they've hurt me, and then rub my face in how much they've "done for me"

people running around trying to "rescue me" when I didn't ask them to, then turning around and getting mad at me

people comparing how much I do for them to how much they've done for me

my sister trying to "help me" become a little wifey-poo when I have no one to be a wifey-poo to

people trying to make excuses for me so that I will feel like I owe them

people offering to do things for me that they know they will never do, just so they can "look spiritual"

my family still feeling like they need to "set me straight" when I am old enough to be a grandma!

I don't need anyone to treat me like a child that has to be coddled and protected from the world--especially since I've already seen too much because these same people were not there for me when I was growing up and being abused!

Great idea for a post!

I don't need my family judging me based on past choices.

I would say "unsolicited advice". That irritates me more than anything else. I have a friend that does that a lot. He's the only friend I have and I just put up with it. Also he gets so involved in almost everything in my life. For an example, if I told him that I'm going to put new curtains up, he would make suggestions on what I should get and want to go with me to a store that he picked out.

One time he got me a little nightstand table (as a gift) that I would have to assemble myself. It looked complicated to me to put together. He told me that what I had looked crummy. The next day I gave it back to him because I didn't want it and I was happy with what I had. He got disgusted.

He even wants to go to the doctors with me and ask them all kinds of questions.

He seems a little bit like Rachel's father (the post she had on Daily Check Ins).

Hey short, what a great idea for a thread!

I do not need:

to be told what a strong person I am and "Do you know that?" (No, darnit . . . I'm broken-hearted. Get it? I used up my strength on years of depression and, now, I can't get out of bed. The reserves have all been tapped. They're depleted.)

to be told by my sister that I just "dwell too much" on the down-side of life.

to be told by my same sister that I just need to use my "coping skills."

to be called "sweetie" by people at the place where I get my health care.

to have my neighbor - and erstwhile friend - monitoring whether my blinds get opened in the day time, so she can keep track of when I'm "crazy" - to use her own word for my frequent mental state of dejection.

to be told by same person that "You Have to Believe." (I don't care if it is true.)

to be told that "Everything happens for a reason." (Does anyone, other than me, get nauseated at the repetition of that trite, stupid aphorism . . . or whatever it is?)

police being sent to my door to see if I'm "safe" by one relative who heard from another relative that I had been crying. (The cops have better things to do, and I have absolutely no history of any "attempts.")

police being sent to my door by my sig. other's daughter because I told her I might be too depressed to continue being primary/only caretaker for her father. (Heaven forbid he might land on her doorstep.)

getting an annual expensive gift basket on my birthday from a sister who has no interest whatsoever in phoning me.

being forgotten.

I do not need my mother telling me that there is no such thing as mental illness, that I dont want to get better and that my psychiatrist pampers me because she gives me drugs.

I don't need my Mom telling me that everyone feels this way sometimes, that it's normal.

Didnt need my step moms abuse.
Didnt need my mom to go and get a broken back.
Didnt need my sister to laugh at me when I said I felt like hell.
Didnt need my brother to treat me like an alien for having feelings.
Didnt need my dad to ignore my step moms abuse.
Didnt need my fair weather friends turning their backs on me.
etc....

Don't need a family to criticize me, so I moved away and don't see them except for holidays when every one is trying to be festive and not bring up the past. If arguing starts, I go to the store and not come back. I call and let them know I decided I didn't want to stay if they are fighting and I will see them next year.

I don't need back-stabbing friends, so little by little untethered myself from them till they were gone.....

I don't need people who tell me what path I need to take to become a healthier person. I am getting better..slowly..I have a path, if in the future I need to get on another path, then I will.

Physically getting rid of people who suck my energy and fill my mind with negative thinking are blocking my way to getting better. Don't know what tomorrow will bring, but for today, this is what needs to happen.

more:
I don't need my sister trying to convince me that I really don't have an illness, that I'm just being "too hard on myself."
People telling me, "You're not that disabled."
Being told that if I just moved to a bigger city, I could actually find a job!
Being told that if I just learned how to drive, that would cure my depression.
People suggesting "good jobs" for me.
My brother in law always calling me a hermit.
My sister always "checking" on me to see if I have any plans for the day.

what don't I need from anyone? drama and stress.

I have the opposite problem--instead of getting too much advice, all my friends and family are tired of putting up with me and my over 15 years worth of depression, hospitals, and suicide attempts. They refuse to talk to me about my depression.

I don't need people telling me:
to just change the way I think
to just get over "it"
that it's my fault for having depression because I do not believe in God
that I just want to stay depressed and lonely

or even worse is when family and friends say nothing and believe if they ignore the problems or "attention-getting", the depression will go away

frown, I know what you mean. That can hurt an awful lot. They can really think that we are just choosing depression. I've gotten that from my S/O and another family member, who can be very smug.

This problem, when it is chronic, becomes hard-wired in. We can't just choose to not be depressed. We do have the responsibility to try our best to manage the problem with its symptoms. We also badly need for there to be others who realize this is a huge challenge to live with. A lot of the time we are trying our best. Recognition of that and encouragement could help a lot. However, I really despair of ever getting that . . . from anyone . . . even professionals.

I don't need my primary care MD asking, rather condescendingly (I thought.), "So what do you do with your time?" (Now that I'm on SSDI.)

I don't need to be told "everyone is depressed" or "you can't expect to feel how you used to years ago, you're older and things change.
I don't need to people to pretend to understand depression and then ask you what you are depressed about...what triggered it.
I don't need to hear at work you don't seem depressed, even though i have mastered through years of practice how to pretend to be happy, which frankly is more exhausting than i care to discuss. This is my first post and i am just tired of feeling this way with no end in sight.