[GirlOfManyFaces]

Wen you don't know. You don't know what you are thinking. You don't know if you feel hungry or not. You don't know what to do with yourself. That's me...today...
I got no work done at school and I'm falling behind. I'm constantly depressed and my head is full of air...
All I can think about is SI and suicide.(I've been SI for a year and attempted suicide a lot)... I don't know what to do.

I feel like somebody stole my brain. I can't think. People have to make decisions for me because I am unable to. I'm brain dead.

I just want to fall asleep and never wake up.

Advice? Comments? Help?

[Marla500]

hi Girl, I'm sorry you are feeling this way, I can certainly relate. I am thinking it might be a good idea to try calling someone if you can't stop thinking about SI. this came from the home page under help: http://psychcentral.com/lib/2007/com...phone-numbers/ I hope things will get better for you

[montanan4ever]

Hi Girl. Listen, you are in trouble. Please, get to a safe place and work with your treatment team to get some options in place so that you can get more stable. It sounds like you could really benefit from a multi-pronged treatment plan, using meds, psychotherapy and perhaps other options like occupational therapy or the assistance of vocational rehabilitation to find some ways to function better and more safely.

[GirlOfManyFaces]

Originally Posted by montanan4ever

Hi Girl. Listen, you are in trouble. Please, get to a safe place and work with your treatment team to get some options in place so that you can get more stable. It sounds like you could really benefit from a multi-pronged treatment plan, using meds, psychotherapy and perhaps other options like occupational therapy or the assistance of vocational rehabilitation to find some ways to function better and more safely.

But I don't know how to do that. I don't know how to ask for help...

[optimize990h]

GirlOfManyFaces, kidshealth.org might have information for you like phone numbers, answers to questions.

But I don't understand about your school because they are supposed to help prevent suicide. I am sure that link you got from another member has this number the hotline to prevent teen suicide-1-800-273-TALK. Please phone that number if you don' t feel safe.

[GirlOfManyFaces]

Originally Posted by optimize990h

GirlOfManyFaces, kidshealth.org might have information for you like phone numbers, answers to questions.

But I don't understand about your school because they are supposed to help prevent suicide. I am sure that link you got from another member has this number the hotline to prevent teen suicide-1-800-273-TALK. Please phone that number if you don' t feel safe.

My school is strange and nontraditional. I can't call a hotline because I don't have a phone. I can only text and email.

[optimize990h]

Gee, a lot of those websites have phone numbers, but can't help through email or chat.
There's one Convenant House has online chat. www.nineline.org

[Ultra Darkness]

When people give me tasks they have to be very specific, because if I have to make decisions, I freeze up. I've been driven to tears before because I'm so worried about messing up. I'm also prone to feelings of emptiness, which are basicly like what you described. No clue what I'm feeling.

Do you have any personality disorders other than multiple personalily that you know of? I ask because I saw you on the bpd forums recently, and that surprised me.

[GirlOfManyFaces]

Originally Posted by Ultra Darkness

When people give me tasks they have to be very specific, because if I have to make decisions, I freeze up. I've been driven to tears before because I'm so worried about messing up. I'm also prone to feelings of emptiness, which are basicly like what you described. No clue what I'm feeling.

Do you have any personality disorders other than multiple personalily that you know of? I ask because I saw you on the bpd forums recently, and that surprised me.

I don't know what I am. All I know is that something is wrong. I haven't be officially diagnosed but I know there is somebody else here constantly. So I know something is wrong.

[Ultra Darkness]

Hmm. Do you suppose you could pm me a general list of your symptoms? I'm not trying to play therapist or anything (although I doubt I could do worse than your current t), I'm just curious.

[montanan4ever]

Here's how to ask for help. You go to the nearest ER and tell the person doing triage, "I can't think of anything else but injuring or killing myself. I really, really want to hurt myself. Please, I need help."

I don't mean to sound simplistic in this. I realize it's extremely hard to do. But it's a start. You could even write it down in a note and hand it to the triage person if you are afraid you won't be able to speak the words out loud.