I just really need help... i dont feel like anyone else will

I feel sad all the time, and i have anxiety issues
a week ago i had a panic attack where i could barely breathe because my mother was yelling at me (nobody would even help me besides my brother who gave me a hug) i was hysterically crying and trying to breathe. I feel no motivation to do anything, i quit the play i was starring in and quit this club i joined and im a senior in high school with 3 F's... Everyone is mean to me for no reason. even my vice principal called me spoiled.

i barely eat because we dont have enough income to get a decent amount of food, i live in a house with a very dysfunctional family that ive even had the cops come over a few times to calm everything down.. i sit in my pig sty of a room all day covered in clothes alone and sit on the computer. i always have aches and pains and my eye twitches like crazy all the time. I always feel sick or like throwing up and no one bothers to help me even when i ask for it....
I started having suicidal thoughts when i was 8 years old. during my sophmore year it started getting really bad. i think about it a lot. i dont think id do it.. but i really contemplate it sometimes and it makes me cry..
i cant even sleep... and even if i do sleep, i could sleep for 10 hours and still feel exhausted.. i feel worthless.. i dont have enough money for councling.. i dont know what to do..

Angela, my first thought is that the vice-principal has absolutely no idea of what your life is really like, assuming you are telling what is really happening at home. (And I have no reason to not think otherwise.)

No wonder you are feeling depressed! Is there a counselor at your school who you can trust? You sure could use someone to get help from in real life, too.

When you get to be 18, then (I assume you're from the U.S. or it's this way other places, too) you are legally able to make your own doctor's appointments and to get help. I suggest, then, you see what clinics might be available, if you don't have much money to spend of your own.

Meanwhile, and I know this behavior won't be easy, try to do the best you can and pull up my your grades, so you can graduate, get a job, and get the heck away from home.

We are here to support you with advice and even friendship. We do care.

Angela, my friend ~ would you do something for me? Would you PLEASE talk to the school counselor? Please believe me when I tell you that they WILL help you if you will TALK to them. Tell them what is going on at home. Be honest with them. It sounds like that is not a very good place to be growing up. It almost sounds toxic.

Honey, I grew up with 2 alcoholic parents, and I would have loved if the police came because I would have told them plenty of things. But back then people minded their own business and no one ever called the police. I know the neighbors heard all the fights. I know they heard my mother screaming when my father beat her up. It was awful. And my home wasn't very nice either. We didn't have much.

Honey don't be ashamed to talk to your counselor because he/she has heard much worse than what you have to tell him/her. And they are trained in this kind of thing, so they know what to do. Please talk to them. You need to have someone to talk to -- someone who understands what you're going thru. And the counselor WILL understand. I promise!!!! So will you do that for me? Will you tell them what's going on? Once you get some of this off your mind, and off your chest your grades will start improving and you'll feel SO much better. You shouldn't be carrying this load by yourself.

Let me know what happens, will you? You can private message me if you want. Or anytime you need to talk, just private message me, ok? I'll be there. God bless honey. Hugs, Lee

Ive tried talking to a school councelor but no luck, she says she will call me back in to check up on me and she never does. then I ask for her myself and she says again she will check up on me but again its the same result.. shes not very much helpful unfortunately. On a brighter note I went and got my blood drawn yesterday and theyre going to check my thyroid. I find myself becoming easily irritated lately though... and I feel bad because I don't want to hurt the people around me, but I cant help it. Even the littlest thing sends me into a mood swing.

Please read the reply I posted to PAYNE1 it's pretty much to both of you, thank you both so much for being here for me