Everytime I try to talk to my mother about it I feel so uncomfortable. She loves me and she'd do anything for me but it's just so uncomfortable for me. She doesn't know what to do for me and she seems to get angry. I just feel like a failure. I feel like the only thing I am is depression, and that the only thing people think about when they think of me is depression. I feel like I should just never tell anyone anything about me, that'd be more comfortable, but I'm too miserable and I need help.

[Travelinglady]

When I am depressed, sometimes I don't want to talk about it to anybody either. I suspect your mother on some level, at least, wants to blame herself--and that's what you are picking up on.

Some people, also, want to blame us when we are depressed, as if it's something we can totally control without help. That would lead me not to admit to it......

Are you able to talk about it with a mental-health professional or some other kind of counselor?

Remember that depression can be caused by a chemical problem in the brain and/or it can even be a normal reaction to life circumstances.

Thank you for your reply.

My depression is caused by my personality, insecurity, and stuff that happened in my life.

I doubt I'll be able to talk about it to a therapist, but tomorrow I'm going to. I have a really hard time expressing how I feel, especially out loud. I'd be terribly nervous right now but it hasn't sunk in yet.

I just feel so damn uncomfortable; even if I weren't depressed, I would be - that's just how I am. Even about other things. Like giving my opinion on something, however trivial it may be, anything emotional, etc. just makes me uncomfortable. I don't know why I'm like this. I don't know if anyone will understand me.

[Travelinglady]

You might want to write your thoughts down and read them off.....

[bharani1008]

Perhaps your mother is frustrated with herself for not being able to help you.
I know how you feel about not wanting to talk to anyone about the depression. You're already fragile and vulnerable. You're afraid of how the other person will respond---if they will reject you. I guess that's why it is probably better to talk to a professional or a religious leader if you have one. I know keeping quiet feels safer but if there is something you can do to get better you can't do it on your own. I hope you get the help you need.