[Karrebear]

I am the fattest
most worthless
unproductive
abnormal,
dysfunctional
ugly
worst mom ever.

I really, really do hate myself and the holidays just remind me of that everyday.

[Idiot17]

((((((karrebear))))))

[Aunt]

Karebear - When we are overly tired, this seems to be negative feedback we find ways to quantify or justify our feelings. What is the trigger for behind your statement that it is the holidays? Do you feel guilt towards something, shame, etc. If you can get to the emotion and then to the cause of the emotion, you can take this on as a self-research to find what triggers it and deal directly with that trigger. Hope that helps.

Ex: Moms feel guilty for not being able to buy presents - register with salvation army. It's a step you would be taking to help the kids have presents to open.
Ex: Your weight makes you feel ugly? Let's team up and commit to 10 sit ups, and other basic exercises per day (low key/low stress) and encourage/check-in with one another on what we accomplish, no?

Originally Posted by Karrebear

I am the fattest
most worthless
unproductive
abnormal,
dysfunctional
ugly
worst mom ever.

I really, really do hate myself and the holidays just remind me of that everyday.

[Karrebear]

I do feel better after a bit of sleep, it's just that I don't feel good enough when we have family get togethers. I feel I don't measure up compared to my siblings. I would just rather just be by myself for the rest of the month...it's easier.

[Fuzzybear]

[Rohag]

Originally Posted by Karrebear

I feel I don't measure up compared to my siblings.

Karrebear, do your siblings actively work at making you feel inferior, or are your feelings strictly internal?

Just an opinion: The worst mom ever would never think of herself as the worst mom ever.

[Clara22]

Hi Karrebear,

I am so sorry you are feeling that way and I get upset when I see young people suffering from comparisons that should not take place, ever. Our culture is stupid and installs this program about comparing ourselves against others in our minds. We do not get anything from that.



Only comparing yourself to yourself or rating your progress with yourself is useful, and this should be to re-direct your life as needed, not to torture yourself.

And...



i wish you the best

[Tapering]

I hate the way the holidays make me and others feel bad. I wish the holidays did not make so many people unhappy. I hope you feel better.

[Martek]

For me the holidays just remind me of how things used to be, that leads to feeling of how far I've fallen and all the mistakes I've made. Not a good feeling I hope you can start to feel better, I'll keep you in my thoughts.

[reesecups]

From Thanksgiving to after New Year I go to 'survival mode'. I can't stand the holidays and for quite sometime now, I haven't had to deal with people who had a good time at holidays. Now I'm in a PHP that is getting ready for Christmas and I'm being around it again. Not handling it well. I am a grinch at Christmas and I know people don't want to be around me when they find out the holidays make me negative. I'm trying to figure out how to be around it a lot without being depressed or angry!

[Karrebear]

Originally Posted by Rohag

Karrebear, do your siblings actively work at making you feel inferior, or are your feelings strictly internal?

Just an opinion: The worst mom ever would never think of herself as the worst mom ever.

Thank you everyone My siblings don't make me feel this way. This is all internal. I just compare myself to them and I don't feel good enough. They are both in a better spot than I am. They are both married, doing well for themselves. I am a single mom living paycheck to paycheck. I am way too hard on myself.

I just want to hide and disappear. Thanksgiving really reinforced that I need to contact my therapist and make a session.

Thank you everyone for listening to me