[Samanthagreene]

I finally told a friend about my depression and her response was, "I think I can understand because sometimes I get sad for no reason too." I was both touched by how she was trying to understand and support me but also a little insulted that she thought depression was just "a little sad for no reason" and I was just such a wimp I needed medication and therapy for it.
What would you say to this response?
-Sam

[ADDithers]

I suppose I'd be glad she had a bit of empathy & didn't just look at me with a screwed up face & say "huh?"

... then I'd thank her for the empathy

[1776]

Say nothing, IMHO. Not everyone is going to understand your illness or how you feel.

[too SHy]

I think it was a encouraging start. Maybe someday soon Depression will be more generally known, even "understood" in a way, which is good. You must have a good way of trying to explain it, and it sounds as if you have a sincere friend.

[healingme4me]

I think you friend was maybe putting how raised? The 'no reason' part, to me, shows a better than average understanding. Maybe 'sad', can come across as minimizing, at the same time, I feel it was more supportive than not having a clue.

Sent from my LG-MS910 using Tapatalk 2

[Bill3]

Could she understand more if you talked with her more?

Maybe you can respond honestly to this friend. "Thank you for your kind words. For me it is really more than that, a lot more. Here is a brief idea of what it is like for me..."

Or maybe not. Maybe she isn't able to hear more than she actually heard. What is your sense of it?

[Pierro]

I think I wouldn't bother saying anything. As you know being a little down and having depression are totally different things you really cant compare them. People trivialise depression all the time. I was told to "think myself happy"! I couldn't tell you what my responce was. Best wishes to you.

[CrimsonBlues]

Originally Posted by Bill3

Could she understand more if you talked with her more?

Maybe you can respond honestly to this friend. "Thank you for your kind words. For me it is really more than that, a lot more. Here is a brief idea of what it is like for me..."

Or maybe not. Maybe she isn't able to hear more than she actually heard. What is your sense of it?

This was what I was wondering as well. It really depends on the person. For some people they are too uncomfortable and fearful about the subject of mental issues and don't really want to understand or talk about it. For some people they may not understand what clinical depression is but that doesn't necessarily mean that they aren't willing to talk about it or to get to a place where they do understand. I think it also depends on the relationship itself. Is this someone you are very close to and want to have an open and honest relationship with? If so, I would respond to the person as Bill3 suggested, which I think is an excellent way to respond.

One idea might be to find some literature on depression that helps to explain what it is and what it isn't. There are some web sites, such as this one, that have helpful descriptions of depression. Maybe you could print out some of these descriptions to engage in a conversation and to help answer questions that might come up. Just a thought. In every book I have read about depression it states the importance of having a support system. I myself don't have one and it makes the battle even more challenging. For this reason I think it's a good thing to try to communicate with your friends and family (if you think they can hear you in a helpful way) about what you are experiencing so that they can be supportive of you-just like if you had a chronic medical issue you were grappling with. In the end, it depends on your relationship and whether you think this person would be able to be supportive and understanding if they only had more information. I wish you all the best.

[venusss]

Maybe she too can be depressed and only calls it sad, because she is afraid to call it by worse name?

I lessen my own feelings a lot. There is lot of reasons somebody who struggles is not on meds or in therapy. Talk to her more and see what it is.

[Punto Bobo]

Originally Posted by Samanthagreene

I finally told a friend about my depression and her response was, "I think I can understand because sometimes I get sad for no reason too." I was both touched by how she was trying to understand and support me but also a little insulted that she thought depression was just "a little sad for no reason" and I was just such a wimp I needed medication and therapy for it.
What would you say to this response?
-Sam

Oh, Sam! She was absolutely doing the best she could! Too many people have no idea -- and she is one of them. I think from this I would learn the level of understanding this friend is capable of. I wish you feeling a lot better and a future with friends who can understand. I was thrilled to get a diagnosis and learn it had a name and I wasn't just a sad-sack! But I had nobody to tell. Keep that friend to meet for coffee or a movie. Don't un-friend her for being somewhat inadequate. I'm a veteran. I had to get out of Bakersfield, CA even if Barbara Kingsolver did write about it! I could not go right or left because of family micro-managing. Now I'll need a barf bag if I hear one more sappy "Thankyouforyourservice!" That's all they know. . .

[Samanthagreene]

We talked it out and I think she gets it now. As far as I know, she's not suffering from depression. Thanks for the support.