Nephew and I having a conversation about the nature of clinical depression, the light bulb suddenly goes on for both of us. He and I agreed, we've both heard people say, "So-and-so can't possibly have depression. Whenever I see them, they're always happy." But depression isn't about being sad and gloomy all the time. It's simply the name of the illness. When you have a cold, are you cold all the time?

"A-choo! I have a cold."
"Well, let's get you warmed up. Wrap up in blankets, and I'll turn the thermostat up."

Time passes. The person with a cold is boiling in the heat, but still stopped up. "You mean you still have a cold? How hot does it have to be in here?"

HAVING a cold is not the same as BEING cold. Same logic with depression.

[Stronger]

Very true. It's also just really hard to understand clinical depression if you've never actually had it. And it's hard to explain it in a way that makes sense. It doesn't even make sense to those of us who have it!
:/

Most definitely. To pretty much all of my friends I'm like some sort of cheerful elf that doesn't have a care in the world and is smiling and happy all the time and it's amazing how just beneath one layer of pretend is doom and gloom the size of a blue whale. It's also frustrating to try to explain to people who have never felt that sense of utter emptiness and hopelessness :/ I have to get real creative with my similes.

[ToeJam]

Originally Posted by Stronger

Very true. It's also just really hard to understand clinical depression if you've never actually had it. And it's hard to explain it in a way that makes sense. It doesn't even make sense to those of us who have it!
:/

This.

confuses the crap out of me... when it's really bad.. it makes sense, but in the interim of it being not so bad, I go through self doubt whether I even have or ever had it.

[Altered Moment]

I guess it is important to not identify myself with the depression. It is something I have not who I am. I struggle with this. I always call it MY depression like it is me. It is hard because I think about it so dang much. It seems like depression is all I think about. How it is effecting me, what I should be doing to treat it, med side effects, etc etc. It can be all encompassing.

It is not who I am it is a disease I have. I need to work on that.

[Truthseeker14]

Originally Posted by ToeJam

This.

confuses the crap out of me... when it's really bad.. it makes sense, but in the interim of it being not so bad, I go through self doubt whether I even have or ever had it.

I do the same thing, then I start feeling guilty because "What if I've actually been fine this whole time and I've just been melodramatizing and over-thinking?!" I mean, I usually just have to give myself a few days before I'm back feeling hopeless again, why should I make the feeling come any earlier?

That's something I need to work on, embracing the interim period rather than beating myself up over it.

[mulan]

I agree with you.
Well you have heard people say that some people.could have depression because they were.always laughing. I said it to myself over and over. That I couldn't ever got depressed. How fool I was.
But its not certainly who We are. I can be and so many different attitudes. And specially.when I'm not feeling so bad I can be a nice person. I just can't control when it comes. And as you live with it a good part of your life, at least in my case, it starts to play a big role in the personality others say I have.