[Sophie0126]

I am trying not to be a people pleaser and people still ask for my help. I help and offer to listen to cook to do errands.

AND I still get rejected,
I still get told I'm not good enough.

I'm tired of all of this.
What's the point of trying to participate in life when I'm being told that I'm pointless, not worthy, not good enough...
I've been crying all day today and can hardly hold it back anymore.

It was ironic to read that you can find online resources to help you when you are resource challenged...really? where? here?

[ChangingMyMind]

Hey there! Chin up! I know how you feel.. but you are worth it and you are good enough. I often feel like I'm not good enough because I can't seem to function like the rest of the "normal" world but then I have to remind myself that I am just like anybody else, we all have our own problems and I am just as worthy as anybody else.

I hope "here" is a resource you can use. It helps me to talk to other people and read their stories when I am depressed or anxious.

[Frankbtl]

Hi Sophie, from what you've said it's not you with the problem at all!! It's them!!
Come on how ridiculous is that: "you're pointless, not worthy, not good enough..."???!!!!
Of course you're.......worthy, good enough!!!! So why let them tell you or make you believe that you're any of those things???
As for the participating in life then, yes, maybe try to go back to being less of the "people pleaser" and focus a little more on you?? And what might "please" you!!
I'd say there's nothing that wrong with being a "people pleaser" and in the right circumstances- awesome!! so don't go "beating yourself up if you're slipping into it again, if it's something about your character but just make sure you've got that balance there. And that you're not "losing yourself" in it all.
It might take people a little while to get used to, might be a little stand-offish, resentful.........at first if they're used to...........but remember you matter!!
Alison

Sophie - Count me in the same court as Alison. You are one of the nicest people here who is always supportive of others.

You are okay. You are more than okay in my book.

[gayleggg]

People in real life have so many problems and are trying to do what they can handle, that they don't take the time show appreciation. Don't take it personally. You've just run into some rude people. Don't let the get you down.

Know that here you are special and we appreciate you.

[Sophie0126]

Originally Posted by ChangingMyMind

Hey there! Chin up! I know how you feel.. but you are worth it and you are good enough. I often feel like I'm not good enough because I can't seem to function like the rest of the "normal" world but then I have to remind myself that I am just like anybody else, we all have our own problems and I am just as worthy as anybody else.

I hope "here" is a resource you can use. It helps me to talk to other people and read their stories when I am depressed or anxious.

Thank you for reaching out to me. It's been hard, really hard to quiet the noise that keeps telling me that I'm not "enough". It hurts so much. I think it's better to be numb than to keep hurting and being "punished".

[Altered Moment]

I prefer numb.

[Sophie0126]

Originally Posted by gayleggg

People in real life have so many problems and are trying to do what they can handle, that they don't take the time show appreciation. Don't take it personally. You've just run into some rude people. Don't let the get you down.

Know that here you are special and we appreciate you.

Those rude people are my only daughter & son in law who have told me that I'm not good enough. I was good enough to be there to help with the birth of my only granddaughter. I took care of the midwifery team and was an active labor coach for her so her husband could take breaks. I was their postpartum doula so son in law could return to work since he did not have any family leave. I changed my schedule to stay longer bc they got their schedules confused. Now that I have been unemployed after losing my career 5 yrs ago with the economic downturn, it's been very very hard to get back on my feet. Finances are not what they once were...and they ask "what's in it for them?"
My heart is breaking that I have not seen my granddaughter in over a year.

[Sophie0126]

Originally Posted by gayleggg

People in real life have so many problems and are trying to do what they can handle, that they don't take the time show appreciation. Don't take it personally. You've just run into some rude people. Don't let the get you down.

Know that here you are special and we appreciate you.

How do you not take it personally when it's my only daughter? She was once part of me...she's sooner have me dead than have me in her life again.
I asked for her empathy and compassion. She gave me pity and disdain instead.

[Sophie0126]

Yes, I have a husband who loves me. I have a dog named Kirby that I rescued when he was 9 months old. Because of our financial circumstances, we live with my 84 y/o mom which also keeps me in stress mode 24/7. Life doesn't feel good not even close to nice these days. How can I fix broken me? Where do I start? Everything is so overwhelming these days. I'm not strong like I used to be. She's gone.