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mel4
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Default Jan 05, 2007 at 06:59 PM
  #1
so my mom comes to school to pick me up, and the car is quite literally smoking. she had gotten into a pretty bad car accident just a few blocks from school. the other car was completely totaled, and the front end of hers is pretty shot as well, but apparently still in "driving condition" (once we drove for a few mintues, we realized it was clearly not...). my mom was pretty frazzled + crying. this car had been given to my mom by her mother shortly before she died, and is a rather sentimental item. on top of this, it doesnt have any collision insurance whatsoever. now, i feel like such a bad child. ive been dealing with depression for a few years now, and just a few weeks ago my parents were informed of my drug use and self injury. i feel terrible. my friends have ditched me, my mom is distraught over many issues (me, my dad cheating, her father in bad shape), and i feel like im only adding to the cause. why cant i just be a good ol' daughter-get nice grades, be jolly, all that fancy stuff. sorry for the ranting. just had to talk.

mel
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Default Jan 05, 2007 at 07:26 PM
  #2
Aww, mel.. I'm so sorry your family is going through rough times. You are a good daughter. Your mom is suffering and you are too. You can still be there for one another emotionally. Talk to her about how hard things are for her too, give her a hug... you'll both feel better. Maybe you could see a family counselor together?

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jlove973
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Default Jan 05, 2007 at 07:30 PM
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I sent you a PM.

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Default Jan 05, 2007 at 07:45 PM
  #4
aw I'm sorry. I sure understand the sentimental aspect too... but that's another story (of mine)

I hope things can work out... good that everyone is ok.

Please don't begin down that road you are going... because you will end up blaming yourself for the car accident if you do...

Do your best. I'm sorry that right now your best isn't really REAL good, but keep trying... there just isn't anything else that works.

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Default Jan 06, 2007 at 12:47 AM
  #5
((((((((((mel44))))))))))))

I'm so sorry to hear that things are so difficult for you and your family right now ... but just know that what you're going through yourself personally, really is separate from that of your mother, and you shouldn't feel guilty about feeling the way you do, on account of her. I understand you love your mom and dont dont want to add to her problems, but you are also very important, and i'm sure she wouldn't want to see you worrying about her. I undestand where you are coming from though, and you must be a very loving and caring person to be feeling all of this for your mom.

I hope that things work out
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Default Jan 08, 2007 at 10:53 PM
  #6
Oh Mel, don't blame yourself. It's not your fault that your Mom had the accident. It's also not your fault that your Dad is cheating and your Grandfather isn't doing well.
Sometimes life just sucks.
You aren't a bad daughter. You have issues and you are only asking for help, whether you realize it or not.
Just do what you can to help your Mom get through this but don't blame yourself.
Wishing you the best.
Hugs,
Linda

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Default Jan 11, 2007 at 01:30 AM
  #7
hey Mel-
I have to agree iwth everyone. Don't blame yourself. But at the same time don't shove your issues aside. I made that mistake as a teen and am now paying for it in my post-highschool years. I too didn't want to burden my parents, but should have. They were infact angry with me when I did finally come to them with my problems. They were angry because I had not come to them sooner.
All you can do right now is be there.
Remind yourself that ACCIDENTS happen, you might need to gingerly remind your mom of this too. (but now might not be the best time...issue might be too raw yet).
Things tend to happen in 3's.....or all at once. Hope you can find some strength and comfort here and get thru these tough times.
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