Ever been told to cheer up and get over it?

I have always been depressed and have always been told by my family and friends to cheer up and get over it. They never seemed to understand the darkness that would fill me and seem to pull me down so far that I felt completely alone and utterly useless. I finally got so tired of people telling me that I'm just trying to get attention that I started putting on my "happy face". Anyone who had done this knows how much harder it is to function when you are trying to hide yourself from the world so you aren't viewed differently. I have never been officially diagnosed with depression but I have been diagnosed with PCOS and depression is one of the symptoms. I have taken several online assessments that have never failed to light up red with 'severe depression' as the results. I have a wonderful husband and two beautiful children but just can't seem to deal with this. I cry and hide it from my family. My husband and I are rarely intimate and when we are it hard for me to enjoy it. I'm tired and always in pain. I just don't know what else to do. It seems like it's getting harder to function daily and I have no way to see a Dr. I have no insurance. My husband and i both work but have both been dropped to part time so we have no health coverage but the children do. I need some advise. How can I deal with this with no help? How can I cheer up and get over it?

I think it is very difficult without professional help. There may be professional resources available to you that you are not aware of depending on where you live.

Other than that I would suggest teaching yourself CBT, cognitive behavior therapy, and take up meditation. Exercise is proven to help if you can find the motivation to do it. Read the section on "other therapies". Some people have good luck with supplements and herbs. A support network of people who understand is very important. If you have severe clinical depression like many of us here you don't just cheer up and get over it. Much more complicated than that. This forum is helpful. We get it.

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I understand -- I've developed an "I'm fine" outer shell too for most people, but my husband sees the day to day depression. I think when someone hasn't experienced what it is like, it just doesn't make sense to them. To them, we should just be able to think positive and it's all better. But it doesn't work like that!
If you are in the US, is there a community health clinic you can go to? There is often a sliding scale at those. I am not sure what they can offer as far as mental health but they should at least be able to direct you somewhere if there are any resources at a reduced rate. I know some states don't have much in the way of social programs like this, but worth a shot if your state does.
One thing I have tried that does help relieve tough emotions is called "Emotional Freedom Technique", or EFT Tapping. It's kind of like accupressure but with a psychological element mixed in. Maybe worth looking into, too.
I hope you'll be able to find some help! Talking in this forum might help too.

"Suck it up" is what my sister tells me...

I know exactly how you feel...Although I've only just begun to be able to start sharing my thoughts by sharing my situation with other people on this forum so I can't really provide any insight or help...

The only person that I provided any hint of my issues is with my brother. He told me to get over my problems and get on with my life. Only if it was as easy as he said...He doesn't bother to understand how hard this is for me and how much it affects me. I already put up a shell as you said like a "happy face" as to hide my problems from everyone and that makes me just reinforce it even more...I feel like it is easy for people to judge us and tell us to cheer up and get over it. They just don't understand how hard it is for us.

I wish you the best of luck and hope we both can see the light at the end of the tunnel sometime soon...

Yes people have said to me things like you have to be stronger, and positive,smile, see funny side of things, get over it, move on, don't dwell on things from past, be grateful, your not ill/dont have illness..

I've been told all of that stuff, like "why don't you go outside and get some fresh air?"
The best part is when someone tells you that YOUR depression is bringing them down. Let's just add a little guilt into the mix.

Common one is find a job, make friends, be with people who are positive. Ive also had a lot of judgmental remarks like you lack confidence, are shy, fragile, hard on self, take things too seriously, take things too personally/personalise things. People seem to think they know best, better than you what to do/how to be but they don't experience/see/feel what its like to suffer with depressive illness.

The worst for me is "what do you have to be depressed about? There are people far worse off than you." Not only is it condescending, it has been used as a viciously manipulative tool against me

I have been told all that stuff. "You need to learn to be more positive. You need to look on the bright side." Today I was told I whine too much. Then I get the guilt trip judgmental remarks. Its as if you already don't feel bad enough people just make you feel worse, so it's easier to put on the "happy face." I think we all understand how you feel. Welcome to the community. I agree with the person who suggested checking into the community mental health resources that charge by a sliding scale. You may have a good chance of qualifying for their services if you are only employed part-time, low income, and non-insured. How do I know this? I have tried to obtain help from one of these places and was turned away because I had insurance, never mind that it's bad insurance and I have a low paying job. Best of wishes.