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#1
Sep 26, 2014, 10:51 AM
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I hate it I am hurting so much and it is because I care to d.. much about family and friends. If I could just turn these feelings off or at least live moment by moment I think I would be better off.
 It is very possible in the near future someone close to me is going to try and manipulate me in to a bunch of things I am not really going to want to do. It makes me very mad but this is very much a part of this persons personality.  . To be honest they never have been technically diagnose with BPD but rather confident they do have it. They do have depression, anxiety, and now PTSD (direct from the horses mouth) on those diagnoses. I love them dearly but hate watching them going down the wrong path. And for me personally it just makes my depression and anxiety so much worse. Anybody have some tools I can use to protect myself without hurting those involved???? 
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Bonnie _______________________________________________ Dx Major Depression, General Anxiety Disorder, cognitive distortions(pretty bad), & little PTSD for fun Rx Bupropion 450mg (depression), Pristiq-generic 125mg (anxiety & depression), Lamictal 150mg (mood stabilizer) Alprazolam 0.25mg (anxiety plus helps sleep easier) 
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 Idiot17, IrisBloom, kaliope
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#2
Sep 26, 2014, 02:41 PM
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well, if you see it coming, you can take steps to prevent it. you can take steps to steer your friend in the right direction even by letting him/her know you are concerned for their welfare and you don't like seeing them go the wrong direction.
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#3
Sep 26, 2014, 03:43 PM
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I've had a similar situation with my daughter. We used to be very close and gradually she started changing, not just toward me, but everybody and everything. I tried very gently to advise her to seek help, but she is in denial. Never before did she ever raise her voice to me or imply that I was wrong, but this started happening more and more. I tried twice in the past year to tell her she needs help, but both times she got verbally abusive to me and I had to leave abruptly, crying. This person is not my daughter. It has caused me much stress and pain. I was headed into a deep depression anyway, but this hastened it greatly. I got back on meds and seeing doc and am much better now. I have to distance myself from her and her problems right now. I care and love her as much as ever, but I have to take care of me first.
It's hard to let go of someone you care about. If this person is an adult you have to let them make their own mistakes and decisions. Be there if they turn to you, but it is not good for you to worry so much about them. It might feel selfish, and it is in a way, but your first priority is YOU. You cannot help them at all if you fall apart. 
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 Purplesept2007
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#4
Sep 26, 2014, 04:55 PM
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Someone can only manipulate you into a bunch of things if you let them. I know how hard it can be to say no but maybe you can start building your boundaries now.
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
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The "paradox" is only a conflict between reality and your feeling of what reality "ought to be." -- Richard Feynman Major Depressive Disorder Anxiety Disorder with some paranoid delusions thrown in for fun. Recovering Alcoholic and Addict Possibly on low end of bi polar spectrum...trying to decide. Male, 50 Fetzima 80mg Lamictal 100mg Remeron 30mg for sleep Klonopin .5mg twice a day, cutting this back |
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#5
Sep 26, 2014, 05:17 PM
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It is also the same for me as it is my daughter and things are complicated I cannot distance myself for many reasons which I would rather not discuss on the forum but if you want to PM me I could into more details. I have no doubt you understand exactly were I am...
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Bonnie _______________________________________________ Dx Major Depression, General Anxiety Disorder, cognitive distortions(pretty bad), & little PTSD for fun Rx Bupropion 450mg (depression), Pristiq-generic 125mg (anxiety & depression), Lamictal 150mg (mood stabilizer) Alprazolam 0.25mg (anxiety plus helps sleep easier)
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| IrisBloom
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#6
Sep 26, 2014, 05:48 PM
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I can relate to what you've described. I do a lot of things for other people without taking my needs or wants into consideration.
I've tried in the past to set some boundaries yet so far I've been unsuccessful. I'm not sure how but they always breach it. Good luck on setting up the necessary boundaries. |
| Purplesept2007
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This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
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