[puzzclar]

I was challenged today to write some lyrics and what I wrote surprised me.

Am I a child of God?
Why has He left me?
I know He has given me my life,
but why do I feel so alone?

Am I a child of God?
Why do I want to die?
Is this the path to choose?
Who can I, no where can I find help.

I've had a hard week and then I write this! I started to cry and still am. I never intended to write this. and no one knows irl. I'm close to talking with T but don't to admit that this is getting bad, really quickly. There was a way to communicate with the rest of the class, anonymous. So I shared the first set. I was the only one that felt so alone..... Now I'm faced with a bigger issue. do I try and call my T to see if there is an opening, There's a part of me that says no. There's a part of me that says "don't be an idiot, ask for help"

[Pierro]

Please do ask for help!! I am sorry that you feel alone. I know what that feels like.

[Roxygirl816]

If u r unsure it's always best to err on the side if caution and get help. Your song lyrics could be reflective of your current feelings but they could also be shadows from another time in your life or they could just be what your mind thought sounded good together. I write poetry so I know the feeling of being surprised by what you write. I always share these with my PsyD which helps cause then she has an idea where my mood actually is or has been. Sometimes she tells me it means nothing and not to worry. If you already have an appointment scheduled with your T and it's close then I would wait till then and talk to him/her. But if you don't have one or it's not close I would call. If you are feeling at all like you may harm yourself in anyway as the lyrics suggest then you should call ur T immediately or go to the emergency room. I'm sorry that your feeling so badly and those are beautiful lyrics. {{{Hugs}}}

[puzzclar]

Things that stop me:
reaching for help has become an area of showing weakness
I think that I know other ways that are just as effective
I kind of like feeling bad

What doesn't help:
researching on effect of media on suicide attempts. (It's for a class that I need to write up a paper and it's so not helping.)

Any ideas of how to defeat these not so great things.

[vital]

Originally Posted by puzzclar

I was challenged today to write some lyrics and what I wrote surprised me.

Am I a child of God?
Why has He left me?
I know He has given me my life,
but why do I feel so alone?

Am I a child of God?
Why do I want to die?
Is this the path to choose?
Who can I, no where can I find help.

I've had a hard week and then I write this! I started to cry and still am. I never intended to write this. and no one knows irl. I'm close to talking with T but don't to admit that this is getting bad, really quickly. There was a way to communicate with the rest of the class, anonymous. So I shared the first set. I was the only one that felt so alone..... Now I'm faced with a bigger issue. do I try and call my T to see if there is an opening, There's a part of me that says no. There's a part of me that says "don't be an idiot, ask for help"

Hi puzzlclar! I think you should call your T and make an appointment. You might even feel partially better just from doing that.

Back when I was depressed, I also noticed that there was music that I really liked, but which really also made me go downhill fast. Sting and Bruce Springsteen were like that. I just had to avoid them for a long time.

I'LL SEE YOU IN HEALTH!! - vital

[puzzclar]

I'm around a lot of people, yet I still feel alone. This sucks

[puzzclar]

It's so much effort to be around others, but hard to ask for help. All of my triggers were hit, and I have to deal with my sister being home tomorrow..... I'm not sure how much more I can take this week.