I seriously hate my family.

It's not fair!! I'm so done with being treated like crap. If I fight with my mom, all my sister does is tell me to shut up, and then is all like "just tell her to shut up, that's it". And if I worry about something, all my mom does is either get mad at me or laugh at me. I was paranoid about going blind the other night and this is someting that's very real to me, and she turned around laughing saying "You're so funny" and I was being dead serious. I'm ready to seriously blow a casket... I would let everybody down if I got sent away back to some mental institute again... the state mental institute is downright horrible and scary, but if I got sent away that's the only place left there'd be to go... but if I wasn't harming myself or whatever than I'd go to Juvie... and I never wanna end up in there. They treat mental illness like we're criminals.
But I'm so sick and tired of my mom's crap, I'm tired of getting no support from them at all. I'm tired of them ganging up on me and making me feel like crap about myself. I'm always wrong in there eyes, and sometimes now I feel like I don't even deserve to watch TV. It's so rediculous. And when this morning I told my mom I'm fed up with having a sore throat and ALWAYS not feeling good, (yes I was mad and was talking loudly) and she just sat there with this smirk on her face like "What you're saying is not true but keep going with whatever you want". I've had it with her. Even my dad is against me now. I have NO ONE. I just want to cry and punch something at the same time. I think the therapist I see is the only one on my side. She's told me that... but I don't know.
One day I'm going to go insane. I'm trying to get my mom to call this CCS program so I can see if I can get help with stuff after I'm 18, but she told me once "But you have us to help you". NO I DON'T, after I'm 18 I don't want my mom helping me with stuff anymore cause all she wants is for me to be drugged up on some kind of med.
What do I do, I'm so tired of her being mean to me like this. She says I'm making it all up, but even now I feel like it when I know I'm not.
Thanks.
Sorry.

Hi Shane,

I believe you. When I was depressed, I was often upset because I felt I was not being treated with respect in one way or another. These thoughts were totally justified, as in fact I WASN'T being treated with respect.

The weird and amazing thing is that now that I am no longer depressed, I'm not bothered by such things. But, ALSO, for some reason, I seem to be being treated with much more respect anyway.

- vital

I'm sorry I don't have any words of comfort or advice. I guess except that I can relate to what you've written and not having support from family and just getting shunned and ganged up on and frustrated with them.....
Hope someone here has some advice for you.
(((((Hugs))))