[Evaluna]

For years I've plastered on the 'everything is OK' face and I'm not sure how long I can keep it up for any more.

Today has been a really bad day. I'm a 35 year old mother and yet doing the school run makes me feel like I'm the child back at school. I'm getting a lot of grief of some of the mums who quite openly laugh at me and be rude to me, and whilst I generally don't care what people think of me I'm finding it getting to me more and more. There's no reason for them to do this, but round here they are very quick to look down their noses at me. I feel pathetic.

My daughter has started noticing and tonight she kept asking what was wrong because I didn't look very happy. I don't want her to think I'm sad, but I hate that she's clearly seeing mum isn't herself.

I try and get her to do things with me like reading, or colouring, or watching a film but she never wants to and I'm not going to make her. Sometimes I just want to sit with her on my knee and cuddle her so much but she's so restless she doesn't do it. I know she's not rejecting me, but she's my only source of affection.

I just feel like I can't go on like this any more but have no idea how to change it or make it better.

[vital]

Originally Posted by Evaluna

For years I've plastered on the 'everything is OK' face and I'm not sure how long I can keep it up for any more.

Today has been a really bad day. I'm a 35 year old mother and yet doing the school run makes me feel like I'm the child back at school. I'm getting a lot of grief of some of the mums who quite openly laugh at me and be rude to me, and whilst I generally don't care what people think of me I'm finding it getting to me more and more. There's no reason for them to do this, but round here they are very quick to look down their noses at me. I feel pathetic.

My daughter has started noticing and tonight she kept asking what was wrong because I didn't look very happy. I don't want her to think I'm sad, but I hate that she's clearly seeing mum isn't herself.

I try and get her to do things with me like reading, or colouring, or watching a film but she never wants to and I'm not going to make her. Sometimes I just want to sit with her on my knee and cuddle her so much but she's so restless she doesn't do it. I know she's not rejecting me, but she's my only source of affection.

I just feel like I can't go on like this any more but have no idea how to change it or make it better.

Hi Evalnua,

Here's my best advice for that

http://forums.psychcentral.com/4262681-post105.html

- vital

[Fuzzybear]

Eva, I'm so sorry you're feeling so badly right now. I think it takes a lot of energy to keep up the facade, doesn't it? Okay, I know it does, because I've done it myself before.

I don't have children, so I've never done the "mums picking up after school" thing, but I can't tell you how many times I've heard women say this happens to them. It even shows up in novels!

You didn't say if you take medication or see a therapist. Therapy would probably be helpful if it's available to you.

I hope things improve.

[sadandconfused]

I am sorry you have to deal with those immature mothers at your daughter's school...that is so wrong! It takes a lot of effort to keep up the fake facade but I understand and still do it too. I don't know how old your daughter is but it is alright, and probably very healthy, to let her know that you are sad and why (only enough detail based on her age). I have tried to be open and honest with my sons as they grew up and asked questions when I was obviously struggling. It was difficult but being honest with them was much better than what they would have imagined if I kept silent and pretended everything was fine. I think it helped them to be more open with me about their problems as teenagers, which are horrible years for most, to maintain a healthy balance.