Lack of Motivation

starryprince · Mar 19, 2015 at 10:40 PM

After years of feeling sad, I finally decided to see a therapist last September, and it has been going well. The psychiatrist I also see has told me that I have chronic depression and I just feel very...angry, I guess. What I hate the most is that I have no motivation to do the things I used to love. My dreams have been destroyed because of my depression. I dreamt of being a professional musician in a philharmonic. I started playing the piano at 5 years old and I was actually decent and I loved it so much and I stopped when I was 13, which was when my depression began. Now I'm in my early 20s and it makes me so sad that my dream is gone...And then I get mad because I feel so lazy.

I'm sorry if this post is dumb. I just feel very lonely tonight and I needed to let out some steam.

Crazy Hitch · Mar 20, 2015 at 02:42 AM

Hi starryprince

I am glad that you decided to see a therapist last September.

It is good that things are going well.

I am sorry that you are feeling no motivation.

This does happen with depression.

You sound really musical.

I get that you say that your dream is gone but are there some elements that you could hold on to?

You post is certainly not dumb and I'm glad that you've posted it, I really am.

What is it that you would really like to be? A professional musician? Is it too late to give up the idea of part time work in the meantime?

I'm just trying to think of some options here.

I still believe you have time on your side.

You are in your 20s.

Please hang in there.

starryprince · Mar 20, 2015 at 09:16 AM

Hooligan: Hello! Thanks so much for being encouraging. I really needed that...You're right, there are still some things I can hold on to. I'm thinking of maybe getting back into taking piano lessons and maybe I can play at some small cafes or something in the city. That wouldn't be so bad.

I just feel like I've wasted the last decade, you know? There are so many things I could have done, but my family didn't have the money to help me take lessons, so that was one of the reasons I stopped...And then my depression just got the best of me.

I also play the flute and I won a trophy for being the best musician in a band. I really wish I could have become a professional musician. Now I'm in my grad school, studying forensic counseling, and I like it a lot...It's just that I also love music...

You're right though...I still have time. Thanks so much.

Menu

My Support Forums - Mental Health Support Groups

Get emotional support and friendship from others like you!

Lack of Motivation

My Support Forums