I've tried everything...

Hey everyone, I'm new here.

*Sigh* About 3 months ago my girlfriend of 2 and a half years left me... It broke my heart and completely trashed my world. The result was that I fell into a deep pool of depression and despair.

I've been fighting this sadness for 3 months now... I've had victories over the problems, but alas I keep falling apart. I'm just exhausted.

I've tried everything. I've fallen back on my faith, and it helped for a while, but it still did not fill the void and darkness inside. I've tried reading books on relationships, and they have only made me feel worse. I've tried positive visualization, and although it works, eventually I fall back down and collapse again.

I just want myself back now, and I can't even do that. I don't know what I can do anymore to get myself back to normal, and I'm just overwhelmed by the effects it's having on my daily life.

I know there is a lot of good happening around me, but I've having so much trouble focusing on it. I can't get motivated to do school work anymore, so I fight through every assignment.

I've also tried taking on new activities that should be exciting, but I can't get any of my friends to do them with me. I'm also a bit afraid of talking to my friends about it anymore, because I just don't want to ruin their "sunshine" so to speak.

I just want this to pass already... I can't even get a good grip on who I am anymore. I don't know how to go back to me.

A little help?

I am sorry that you and your girlfriend are no longer together. It is hard when you have been together for a while. Have you considered going to see a t and working through all your feelings? Sometimes it can really help to have someone to talk to. I hope you start to feel better soon. Take care.

BTW welcome to PC!

BB

Hey there,
I'm sorry to hear about your problems. I can associate with that helpless feeling, where you try everything but nothing seems to change. There's just so much you don't have control of. Here's a couple of things I've been trying. First off, don't give up. You're trying hard to change yourself for better, and you have to believe it'll turn out for the better. Second, try and set a small goal for the day. I you don't accomplish it, don't sweat it, there'll be another day. Finally, no one is perfect. Don't be afraid to lean on your friends. You're friends because you care about each other.

Lythius, I am awfully sorry about your loss; it seems the two of you had a very fulfilling relationship. It's a big loss. And one to be grieved. I think sometimes it's best not to focus on 'getting over it', rather allowing oneself to grieve, permit yourself to feel the sadness, and feel it for as long as it needs to be felt.
Do you have another friend you can spend time with? Someone to talk to about your loss?
What was the nature of the breakup? Did she give you an explanation? Is there a chance of repairing things with her?
I can hear your pain.
Come talk to us, we are here for you.
Take gentle care,