I can't say I'm depressed at the moment. I'm not in a low. I do feel sad. But mostly, I'm so tired. Exhausted from the years of fighting. I don't want to fight anymore. I need a rest. It's too hard to keep myself afloat. Pick myself back up every time I fall... Life isn't always easy, but why does it have to be so damn hard?! All the time

[moostress]

I agree with you completely. Just when you have picked yourself up, it seems like life is always offering new obstacles. Heck, for me even getting out of bed is a problem when I think of what is ahead. They say take one day and one step at a time, but most of the time I just want to hide away from everything.

I don't really have any advice or any enlightening response but I wanted you to know that you are not alone and that I am here to listen and to care. I have this hope that if there are other people to care and talk with somehow the burden of life that is shared is a burden that we don't have to carry alone.

[TheLifeFantastic]

It's hard to make recommendations, but I was told recently by somebody that it would benefit me to break out of my usually habits of the day and do something else. So now I'm staining a fence out on this beautiful farm filled with horses. I can't assume what your life is like, but maybe sampling something different might help you.

[Keyslost]

I think some would say its life's way of trying to better you. I would say its an opportunity to try to be somewhat happy in the lowest times of your life. That way you show life who's in charge (did that make sense? I'm using metaphors with non-metaphors prob confusing) Anyways I'd say everyone has their own reason behind it. But actually living that sadness imo all someone could really ask of you is to take it one day at a time and ride out those waves (as well as getting help if needed and talking to us )

[imogenheap]

i feel exactly the same.. it's always the same relapses and i don't even know where they come from or what causes them??

but i'm positive that one day, i'll get out of this. i have to. for myself, yes of course, but also to show others (esp my family who's given me the most ****) that i can be who i am and i can do what i believe in and not be confined by our society's standards.

You too, will get out of it. you posting here on this website is already a big step, it shows you're trying, that you're looking for help, that you want to see a change.

and remember that you are allowed to give yourself some rest, too. take a day off work/school and just do whatever makes you feel good. stay in bed for the whole day, treat yourself to a cup of coffee or beautiful new clothes, or new music or a new book or anything that works for you.

please stay strong, keep fighting, it will get better one day, i promise you.

[Fuzzybear]

[Bumbobee]

I can surely relate Z. I don't know if you're on meds and in therapy but those have helped me at different times in my life along this journey of depression. Like you i'm kinda struggling at the moment but I hope that you find some respite soon.

Originally Posted by Zayabean

I can't say I'm depressed at the moment. I'm not in a low. I do feel sad. But mostly, I'm so tired. Exhausted from the years of fighting. I don't want to fight anymore. I need a rest. It's too hard to keep myself afloat. Pick myself back up every time I fall... Life isn't always easy, but why does it have to be so damn hard?! All the time

[vital]

Originally Posted by Zayabean

I can't say I'm depressed at the moment. I'm not in a low. I do feel sad. But mostly, I'm so tired. Exhausted from the years of fighting. I don't want to fight anymore. I need a rest. It's too hard to keep myself afloat. Pick myself back up every time I fall... Life isn't always easy, but why does it have to be so damn hard?! All the time

What you say is so familar to me Zayabean. It feels like treading water - a constant endless effort just to keep from sinking.

I got over my depression and I think you can too. One of of the things that really shocked me once it was gone was just how much energy I now have. I didn't realize it, but being depressed was a constant, constant drain on me even when I wasn't actively stressing or ruminating about something. When the fog lifted, it was the most wonderful thing. Just sitting quietly and doing nothing, I have the feeling of growing health and vitality as if I'm absorbing energy from my surroundings.

- vital