[ak482]

I can't do it. I can't keep fighting uphill in the mythic belief that pitiful little me will find a loving relationship and losing my virginity. I am a screwup. I should have had sex when I was in college, I wouldn't be seen as a f*****. I have earned my loneliness though, I'm too much of a wimp. I need to put myself out of my misery forever & let the world kick me while I'm rotting six feet under.

[sideblinded]

(((ak482)))

You are in pain. Your emotions are swallowing you with negative thoughts. It is ok to feel and be sad but please do not entertain thoughts that are not true. You sound young so you are OK. Let the pain pass and wait until you can think more clearly. You are worthy of love. Let the time be the right time. You will be OK, you'll see.

[ak482]

Thank you for your kind words

However, I am a 33 year old virgin male. I am, to be blunt, seen as a disease. I try so hard to find a relationship. It will never happen. I can hit it off chatting on the phone, but in person I'm a sorry excuse for a male.

Some are never meant for love. Some are meant to watch everyone have joy but themselves. I am in that class. It hurts too much, and my fear of death is lessened as my pain increases.

[hjames]

I feel for you. For some of us finding a woman is the challenge of our lives. I'm married but still insecure because deep down I never did find the answer- instead I stumbled into my first girlfriend who was just as messed up as me and we married. I have no decent advice. There are women and circumstances that may just dial the right combination in your future.

[Bernard54]

Don't give up, 33 is still young. I felt much the same as you do. But, when I was 40 I found someone that loves me for who I am, even with all of my 'problems'; Asperger's, depression, OCD.

We have now been together 20 years, have beautiful children and are still very much in love.

Sometimes we just have to wait for that right person to come along...and I do believe that there is a person out there for everyone.
As I said, don't give up. You may meet the perfect person for you tomorrow, or it may be a few more years...but, in my opinion, it's worth the wait.

[OneInBillions]

Originally Posted by ak482

I can't do it. I can't keep fighting uphill in the mythic belief that pitiful little me will find a loving relationship and losing my virginity. I am a screwup. I should have had sex when I was in college, I wouldn't be seen as a f*****. I have earned my loneliness though, I'm too much of a wimp. I need to put myself out of my misery forever & let the world kick me while I'm rotting six feet under.

I feel your pain. I've always been a hopeless romantic, but being a 30-year-old male and still a kissless virgin is... very painful. But life is about so much more than just love and sex, right? Maybe you could devote yourself to your job, or hobby, or friends, or whatever else.

For what it's worth, I say stick it out. You never know what tomorrow might bring.

[Fuzzybear]

[ak482]

Last night I was chased by a psychotic piece of ghetto trash for the crime of expressing shock at his driving 100+ MPH on the highway. I wonder if maybe I should have found out whether or not he had a gun & let him pull the trigger on me. I feel very little joy, and what positives I have are immediately cancelled out by a worry or negative, and my hopes for love have gone down below zero