Have you ever given yourself a "time" limit?

Ever since my severe depression began (about 11 years ago) I always told myself that I would be reasonable and give life a really good chance to pick up until I turned 25. I don't really know what I expect to happen when I reach that age... maybe I'll just 100% lose my mind or do something really stupid if things aren't okay by then. Well last month I turned 23 and it seems as though my life is going downhill. It hit me that 25 is less than two years away now and it scares me to think that if the last 11 years were so rough, what does the future have in store for me?

I guess I've been thinking about this more today than ever because I do feel like I'm losing my mind now. I have this absolute hatred for EVERYTHING. I'm really not a rude person (even though what I'm about to say might seem otherwise) but I actually, really hate all humans (with the exception of my parents and sister). I have yet to come across a decent person with morals. I'm serious. Even my own relatives get my blood boiling. I've travelled around a lot, I've lived in many places, been to different countries and the mere thought of people in any of those places just disgusts me. And believe me, I'm at the top of my list of people I despise. I know that there's probably that one decent person floating around somewhere, but what are the odds that I'll ever run into them? I feel crazy! I hate feeling this way (hatred wears you out) but I also don't want any despicable person's help. I feel more alone than ever when I feel this way. I hope I haven't offended anyone with this (maybe one of you are the one decent person out there... I don't know(?)) So please don't take offense to this... it's just how I feel.

are you in therapy? Really it takes your mid twenties before you can separate from you family dynamics and start to work on your own issues sometimes. I hope you find the right combination (therapy, meds, support). I do think you should keep working/keep the faith.

My time limit is 30, and I'm 22 now. I don't know how I'll feel or what when I approach that age. I hope you are seeing a therapist and getting the treatment you need. Things can turn around in an instant, so don't give up hope.

Thanks for responding esthersvirtue and asylumgardens. I'm not seeing a therapist now (maybe in the future). That doesn't seem like something I can bring myself to do at this point in my life.

30 seems to be everyones time limit cos its mine too and i turn 26 in november

times moving on and im still stuck where ive been my whole life

what to do what to do

looking at it from this side of 50 , time limits are constructs that seem to evaporate as you get closer to them. You do what you can do when you can do it. If you keep going you will get there. Of course we dont think the same throughout our lives, and we certainly can improve ourselves, broaden our horizons, get better, but i really still just feel like me after all these years.

Anony, seems to me that if you despise everyone there must be a flaw in your perception because "everyone" isn't that perfect? :-) I always raise red flags for myself when I get to using the "all" "everyone" "the other guy" :-) thinking and start looking harder at my thinking rather than the "situation" as I currently see it.

Twenty-five is an okay age, or any time limit if you're doing different things. Just "hoping" things will get better, they probably, at best, will just go along the same (or get worse :-) I'd make a plan of some sort? I think when one gets a bit older, we're so use to start-school-1st-grade-go-12-years-end-school thinking that we think everything is like that but after one gets to be 18, 21, whatever and more on one's own, that all stops and we have to figure out our own interests, routines, and plans. I went through high school then automatically went to college and graduated, 1968-1972, like I was "supposed to." But I only got C's and it wasn't until 1991 that I finally "got it" that I was the only one here, in charge of Me! My stepmother didn't care what grades I got (in 1991), the teacher didn't care, etc., it was what I "wanted."

What do you want for yourself? Make a plan for the next 2 years and work at it and I almost guarantee you'll get there or close? But just waiting for the time to pass like passing time will do all the work won't work?

i remember, when i was about 7 or so, that i wouldn't live to see my 10th birthday. which is quite morbid. then i thought i'd never see teens. then it was 16. and i'm 16 in july...

I just can't live that way, with a time limit.... this IS my life... whether I'm totally happy with it or not. Life is the journey. Sometimes things don't change until we "get" the purpose of it, maybe?

(((hugs))) It does no good to set such limits, imo... and can only be more depressing, to me.

I agree with Sky...Time limits are for goals - something you want to achieve.

my time limit is for that.. a goal .. something i want not just sit and wait
i never changed it its always been 30
i tried to give myself enough time (i was like 15 when i made it)

I think 15 years is too long for a goal - think in terms of goals for today, for this week, for this month, for this year. Even Strategic plans for companies only go out 5 years and they are re-evaluated every year.

You really can't say I want "Blank" to happen before my 30th birthday when your 30th is 15 (or what ever number) years away. It's too vague, not measurable...too easy to get off course.

it was about getting better feelin better
even just a lil
i have other goals
short term goals
realistic goals

its hard to have shortterm goals if there is no long term goal
with out a long term goal to look forward to achieving why bother in between so much..

i cant explain it that well
i just know in me what i mean

I'm glad that you have the other goals - I'm sorry I had gotten the wrong idea going in my mind.

Never a time limit, but am trying to increase the periods between my depressive "relapses" as I call them. It's getting better slower, weeks as opposed to days now.

I can see how a time limit might be useful, but I have to admit, I'm scared of setting one in case I don't make it... I'm scared it would make me feel like more of a failure!

Respect to those who have one tho, you're braver than me!

-Meander