[moooo2u]

I'm sitting in my car working and ready to head into the chiropractor and I was just thinking that I'm tired of constantly worrying about not being able to pay my bills and working at a job I hate and just all the other nonsense that I have to deal with in a day. I know I should be grateful - i have a job - I have a job where I can sit in my car and work. I'm just so tired. I make sure that everyone else is taken care of but I'm just so tired. I need to take back my life but there's just no time.

[(JD)]

awww moooo... I hear ya... Yes, yes, keep focus and thankful for the job and car... and realize everyone practically is "in the same boat"...

I cannot allow myself to think about all the "wrongs" in my life and all that I, too, am tired of. ... when I hear someone in the PT office complaining about it being "6 weeks" to heal... I mention my 29 years (just to give them a reason to be thankful?) not to put them down...but to show I understand the struggle.

You can find something SOME thing that gives you pleasure... and then begin making a list... simple things that take no real time or very little money... like blasting your favorite song??? or indulging in a very small ice cream cone??? No guilt allowed! You really do need to boost yourself and reward yourself... or plan for the longer haul vacay... putting even .50 a week away... honest, it adds up and it may save your life by allowing you to hope to take off for even a whole day of enjoyment??
What do you need to do to "take back your life" ??? Be in control of something... for sure... but that could be a short list too...so you don't feel so out of control.

I think you're doing terrific, btw.

[debramorgan42]

Originally Posted by moooo2u

I'm sitting in my car working and ready to head into the chiropractor and I was just thinking that I'm tired of constantly worrying about not being able to pay my bills and working at a job I hate and just all the other nonsense that I have to deal with in a day. I know I should be grateful - i have a job - I have a job where I can sit in my car and work. I'm just so tired. I make sure that everyone else is taken care of but I'm just so tired. I need to take back my life but there's just no time.

I've been there.... and it seems like no matter how seemingly small amount of work and things I do it is the same.
there were exactly two things that helped me out of these... helped to balance out the equation on this;
A hobby - anything for any sort period of time - Some more challangeing adrenalin boost sport - such as wall climbing - just once a week. Or some relaxing one like yoga, that streches your body. Or maybe to buy a simple musical instrument and play on it....
or if you don't have that much time. Just try any "fidgety" thing to do....
I mean from ordering your tools in your garage, to build some small thing - like a box or lamp or some other things.
Maye sewing stuff - even fixing up old things while watching TV/netfix or listeing to music. Instead of just staring blankly at the screen, allowing the horror rush trou-out your body. A little bit of alone time.
It can be really any trivial thing. Like - as it was mentioned before - an icecream on the way, a better looking rute to a place with your car Nice/relaxing or hardcore and lound music
Night drives!!
for me it was usually a walk... from one bus-stop to another - with lound music or taking reeeeaaaaally long showers.
Try to use these little times for small things... fill the gaps up with experiences that are just yours....

[Fuzzybear]

Moo, I have been there. I understand the feeling stuck in a rut and things not the way you want or expected. Take time out for yourself. Decorate your home as a vacation resort, play good music. Cook a nice meal, read a good book, watch a good movie. Or take the time to just go for a walk or ride a bike. Make a list of all the things you have accomplished and put in order for yourself. Reflect on the growth you have made. Write a small list of goals and when you finish one, cross it off. Write in a journal of all the things you've encountered and how you overcame them. There are many possibilities that you can come up with. Mostly, be kind to yourself. I feel for you. Blessings.