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Old Oct 08, 2015, 11:13 PM
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Macwoods Macwoods is offline
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Member Since: Apr 2014
Location: Texas
Posts: 36
I tried to kill my self yesterday. Obviously i didnt die. To me it feels like im a failure. No one cares you know? I have no friends. My boyfriend rather **** me then help. I tried to od on my meds. He just wanted to **** me after i told him that. No concern. Nothing. I feel used and alone. So very alone. Al my suppose friends are to busy. Even as i wait hoping i get a text from them. Anyone. But i get nothing. Nothing at all.
Is it just me*
Or am my a illusion
Caught up in this confusion of reality
That one step this way can dictate how i feel today
Or one step that way can end and destroy bridges
I held dear to my soul
Causing the days go by
In this confusion
This mess
That even the unrest can not rest
Those trapped animals i see at the zoo
I feel like them
My soul so broken by the endless chatter
That not even god him self cant help matters
Or make them worse
With deep regret i shall curse
The only unbroken soul is the sun
The heat of its fearsome anger can not be over run
By false admires. Strangers or relationship changers.

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  #2  
Old Oct 09, 2015, 01:34 PM
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gayleggg gayleggg is offline
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Member Since: Apr 2013
Location: Texas
Posts: 26,619
I'm so sorry you are feeling so low and that your bf wasn't any support. That sucks. I am glad that you are still alive. Because as long as you are still alive there is hope. Things can improve. You are worthy of a happy life, but sometimes it just sucks to wait until the good comes around. I wish you better days ahead.
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Bipolar I, Depression, GAD Meds: Zoloft, Zyprexa, Ritalin

"Each morning we are born again. What we do today is what matters most." -Buddha
  #3  
Old Oct 10, 2015, 12:30 AM
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Macwoods Macwoods is offline
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Member Since: Apr 2014
Location: Texas
Posts: 36
Thanks

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  #4  
Old Oct 10, 2015, 03:19 AM
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ArtsieLady ArtsieLady is offline
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Member Since: Nov 2008
Location: Canada
Posts: 66
I'm glad you are still here........because you have a chance to get better and to have a better life. I tried to kill myself last month, and my (now ex) boyfriend didn't care either...he basically messed me up a lot........I'm really trying to just surround myself with anyone who is positive and only wants the best for me. I suggest you try to do the same. I know it can be hard to let a person go, when you have relied on them in some way.........but if someone is causing you more pain than happiness, it's time to move on.
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