[Nike007]

Hello. Currently I am only diagnosed with a couple of anxiety disorders, so.... yep.

Anyways, I have been depressed for the past 5 years due to high stress part of my parent's divorce (so I believe I would be diagnosed with depression and trauma/stressor NOS). I use to keep my feelings all to myself for 4 years, but I have learned at it's okay to tell people how you feel. I was too scared to do even that. I did do a screening for depression, but nothing was high but interpersonal issues from my social anxiety so that was fine. In my opinion, nothing was considered depression level because she said to answer from the past 2 weeks, and I wasn't experiencing MDD, but I think it's pervasive depressive disorder, which only needs to last a year in teens, and it has lasted for 5. My mood would be atypical though because things do make me happy.

Anyways, I was going to wait until I was an adult without dealing with the divorce issues anymore kinda, but now it's getting worse because old wounds are reopening because the divorce issues have gotten worse than before and now I am seeing a lawyer because of it. And I'm only a teen. I have been super stressed and depressed because of all these issues and I don't think I can control it anymore. I feel sad inside, but I don't want to show it. I want to get help for it, but I don't want my parents to know they are causing me all this stress that had changed my mood negatively.

So do you guys think I should tell my pdoc? I am getting into a new place soon and they are going to probably rescreen me anyways so... I really don't want my parents to know this though, and since I'm under 18, I feel like they have to. What should I do? Thanks.

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[Inmiddlelifeguy]

Hello Nike007

In a word, divorce "SUCKS!" Even more so for you kids in the middle of it all. I've been a divorcee and the step parent to two boys who went though it.

As far as talking to your parents, you will have to gauge how and if to go forward. However, you are a person no less than either of them and if you are suffering then you have the right to speak up. To suffer in silence often damages your health. As you have noticed. And you may feel like you are protecting your parents, but at what cost to you. And would they really want you to silently swallow your pain.

Regardless of you choice you can come here to express yourself and hopefully find some comfort. You are not alone.

For now, take care and be safe.

[Tauren]

Well, two thoughts:

1. Yes you should tell your Pdoc because they need to know everything or they can't help you and might give inappropriate treatment.

2. For me, being able to talk to my friends about my depression helped more than therapy ever did. Don't assume that dealing with your depression necessarily means meds and therapy, it can mean other things.

[Fizzyo]

Tauren is right, talking to your Pdoc honestly is essential to get the right help. Depending on your age, you may be able to negotiate a bit about how much they say, or at least how they say it, taking into account your concerns.

Your parents, however probably know you're struggling and almost definitely will assume it's to do with the divorce so, if you feel safe with them, letting on about some of what you feel may be a relief for them. If they are aware you are suffering, sometimes they think their responsibility for it is even worse than you feel it is (if that's possible) and they may feel unable to support you if you don't let them in.
However, you know your parents better than we do, so the decision is your yours.

[Nike007]

Originally Posted by Inmiddlelifeguy

Hello Nike007

In a word, divorce "SUCKS!" Even more so for you kids in the middle of it all. I've been a divorcee and the step parent to two boys who went though it.

As far as talking to your parents, you will have to gauge how and if to go forward. However, you are a person no less than either of them and if you are suffering then you have the right to speak up. To suffer in silence often damages your health. As you have noticed. And you may feel like you are protecting your parents, but at what cost to you. And would they really want you to silently swallow your pain.

Regardless of you choice you can come here to express yourself and hopefully find some comfort. You are not alone.

For now, take care and be safe.

Sorry this took too long to reply. I didn't get a notification on my phone for it.

I know it does damage a person, since if I don't express the sadness inside of me, I tend to be explosive for a day or two every month or so.

I don't know what to do.

Thank you .

[Nike007]

Originally Posted by Tauren

Well, two thoughts:

1. Yes you should tell your Pdoc because they need to know everything or they can't help you and might give inappropriate treatment.

2. For me, being able to talk to my friends about my depression helped more than therapy ever did. Don't assume that dealing with your depression necessarily means meds and therapy, it can mean other things.

I know I should, but I don't know if I can. I am so afraid of being judged for being considered depressed. My parents would probably compare me to someone who would have it worse than me and say to stop complaining about it.

I don't talk to my friends about this stuff because my friends don't want to hear about my terrible life stories.

And yes, I know it isn't.

Thanks for the response .

[Nike007]

Originally Posted by Fizzyo

Tauren is right, talking to your Pdoc honestly is essential to get the right help. Depending on your age, you may be able to negotiate a bit about how much they say, or at least how they say it, taking into account your concerns.

Your parents, however probably know you're struggling and almost definitely will assume it's to do with the divorce so, if you feel safe with them, letting on about some of what you feel may be a relief for them. If they are aware you are suffering, sometimes they think their responsibility for it is even worse than you feel it is (if that's possible) and they may feel unable to support you if you don't let them in.
However, you know your parents better than we do, so the decision is your yours.

That may work. I don't consider myself MDD right now (I know it gets worse in the winter though), but pervasive depressive disorder is always a thing for me. Atypically though.

I don't know if they do. Well, my dad does, I don't know if my mom does. My health thingy is complicated. With divorce contract reasons and such.

Thanks .

[Fizzyo]

Your Pdoc won't judge you. They have seen peopl with all sorts of issues and know how strong you are because you're still here and reaching out.
Sending the warmest hugs and thoughts I possibly can.

[Nike007]

Originally Posted by Fizzyo

Your Pdoc won't judge you. They have seen peopl with all sorts of issues and know how strong you are because you're still here and reaching out.
Sending the warmest hugs and thoughts I possibly can.

I'm not afraid of the pdoc judging me. I'm afraid of my parents judging me. Thanks .

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[vital]

Hi Nike,

I don't even have to read your post to know that the answer is Y E S.

The reason is that there is lots of healthy things you can do to help yourself even though you are a young person. You have nothing to lose by trying. Here are some ideas:

http://forums.psychcentral.com/4262681-post105.html

- vital

[Nike007]

Originally Posted by vital

Hi Nike,

I don't even have to read your post to know that the answer is Y E S.

The reason is that there is lots of healthy things you can do to help yourself even though you are a young person. You have nothing to lose by trying. Here are some ideas:

http://forums.psychcentral.com/4262681-post105.html

- vital

Thanks. I really didn't understand the post you posted, but I'll read it again. Before my parents' divorce, I was pretty happy, normal weight, slept well. Now I'm just a depressed, tired, overweight girl trying to fit into a piece not shaped to her moulding. It's hard to fit in when you are overweight. Everyone wants girls to be slim, but I'm so depressed I eat to cope with it.

Anyways, thanks for the response .

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[vital]

Originally Posted by Nike007

Thanks. I really didn't understand the post you posted, but I'll read it again. Before my parents' divorce, I was pretty happy, normal weight, slept well. Now I'm just a depressed, tired, overweight girl trying to fit into a piece not shaped to her moulding. It's hard to fit in when you are overweight. Everyone wants girls to be slim, but I'm so depressed I eat to cope with it.

Anyways, thanks for the response .

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No problem Nike. I want you to do well.

I think the first best step is to check for physical stuff. You might get some inspiration about how this might help from this video

- vital

[Fizzyo]

Hi Nike, I have always felt like a square peg in a round hole too.

As I got older I have sometimes been able to revel in being individual and a bit quirky which is a good feeling.
I'm not so good at that right now, but I hope to get there again, it's a creative way to be and people have envied me a little.
This is not to make you feel bad, but to try and communicate a little hope.

I really feel for how you are now and I'm so hoping that you will see some sort of light at the end of the tunnel

Hang on in there, you must be a strong person, you're here, which shows you haven't completely given up.

[Nike007]

Originally Posted by Fizzyo

Hi Nike, I have always felt like a square peg in a round hole too.

As I got older I have sometimes been able to revel in being individual and a bit quirky which is a good feeling.
I'm not so good at that right now, but I hope to get there again, it's a creative way to be and people have envied me a little.
This is not to make you feel bad, but to try and communicate a little hope.

I really feel for how you are now and I'm so hoping that you will see some sort of light at the end of the tunnel

Hang on in there, you must be a strong person, you're here, which shows you haven't completely given up.

I had written a reply for this, but I don't know where it went.

No, I understand what you are saying. You aren't being mean or making me feel bad at all .

Thank you . I'll try. And I haven't given up completely yet, no. Just sometimes on the occasional day. Not fully, no.

Thanks for the response .