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#1
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Every now and then I have thoughts of just ending it all. Nothing specific, just thoughts of how easy it would be to leave this hell of a place we call Earth. I usually only have these thoughts at night when I'm trying to sleep but every time I think about it I immediately rethink it and change the subject in my mind. I know I'm not suicidal because of my views on suicide. I think it's stupid, a cowards way of dealing with their problems, yet I'm not sure what problems I would have to give me these thoughts in the first place. I would never actually kill myself because life has too much to offer and I'm only 19. Plus it's not fair to my friends and family and just makes me look selfish. I'm not willing to tell anyone in my family because they make a big deal out of everything and I'm really trying to avoid the drama. I'm just wondering if anyone else has experienced these thoughts and have the same views as I do along with being around the same age as me.
Last edited by bluekoi; Oct 13, 2015 at 08:34 PM. Reason: Add trigger icon. |
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#2
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Everyone has thoughts from time to time that they would not act on. I really wouldn't worry about it too much unless you start to have urges to act on these thoughts. It also means that you could be prone to depression, So be sure to keep up healthy habits to reduce the risk of developing major depression.
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"We can hear the night watchman click his flashlight ask himself if it's him or them that's insane"- Bob Dylan 20 mg Citalopram |
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#3
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I think there are definitely certain junctures in our lives where these thoughts are more likely to occur, when we are at crossroads of sorts. I ruminated about the idea quite a bit when I was a teenager, then hardly at all for a couple of decades, and now that I'm approximately middle-aged I find my thoughts going there again. I certainly don't think it's anything too unusual to have the thoughts, and it may even have an evolutionary basis of which we are not in control.
That said, the thoughts are there to tell you that there's something for you to deal with .. an early warning system, if you will. It could be a good time to incorporate one or two additionally positive habits in your life.
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“We use our minds not to discover facts but to hide them. One of things the screen hides most effectively is the body, our own body, by which I mean, the ins and outs of it, its interiors. Like a veil thrown over the skin to secure its modesty, the screen partially removes from the mind the inner states of the body, those that constitute the flow of life as it wanders in the journey of each day.” — Antonio R. Damasio, “The Feeling of What Happens: Body and Emotion in the Making of Consciousness” (p.28) |
#4
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This is called "suicide ideation." The what-if without really planning it out. It is common - even amongst people with healthy minds.
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#5
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hi someonerandom,
they are called suicidal ideation thoughts. I have them from time to time . I have kept my promise to my therapist for a year now. whenever I have a suicidal ideation thoughts in my mind , I remind myself don't do it remember your promise to your therapist . my next step is to call the Suicide Prevention Hotline when it happens . yes I agree with you someone suicide is stupid and to me Suicide is wrong
Possible trigger:
Diagnosis: Anxiety and depression meds : Cymbalta 90mgs at night Vistrail 2 25 mgs daily for anxiety prn 50 mgs at night for insomnia
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![]() Last edited by bluekoi; Oct 14, 2015 at 08:42 PM. Reason: Add trigger code. |
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