I Don't Know What to Do *trigger warning*

I feel so lost and hopeless. Some days I feel like suicide's inevitable. I've written letters to my roommates, parents, and a friend I've alienated letting them know that it isn't their fault if anything were to occur. I'm seeing a therapist and taking anti-depressants, but nothing seems to work. I don't know what else I'm supposed to do.

Dear xlz24,

Feeling hopeless is part of depression, but it is not real. I do not believe that the situation is hopeless for you at all. I'll put some links below that might help but for the moment, you might want to try seeking out what is supporting and helping and healing in your life already. Ignore the future and the past and only pay attention to what's right in front of you. Live in your senses. There are things that are trying to heal you. Your eyes, your ears, your sense of touch, your sense of taste, your breath, your body. Feel these things deeply. That's what I do if I feel low. You can think of your own senses and your own body as part of your support team. When you are depressed, you forget about them, but they are there, they are always on your side and they are trying to heal you.

- vital

http://egg.bu.edu/~youssef/SNAP_CLUB/BA.pdf

http://forums.psychcentral.com/4262681-post105.html

Hello xlz24,
I'm very very sorry you feel so hopeless. That is such a horrible place to be!!
I have also had very similar thoughts. People here have helped me find the courage to face the next day (or even the next hour or 15mins).

I was able to dalay taking irreversible action and now things do look a little better.
I so hope you get the support you need here and find that chink of light to aim for.

I was also helped so much by the Samaritans, they were there for me even when speech was impossible and had all the time in the world. They now have a new free phone number (if you're from Portsmouth UK) a strange one - 116123 and I urge you to use it. If not in uk, there will be similar helplines in your area and they always think you're worth supporting, whatever you say.
I really truly wish with all my heart that a glimmer of hope will find you or you will find it.

Let your therapist know that things are not working for you.
Feeling hopeless is a lousy place to be. I've spent my share of time there.
Don't know what else to say, but you are not alone.