Summary.

So my dad's got stage 4 Cancer, I literally don't feel anything anymore, all I wanna do is hits of coke, still got no friends, still got 2 years of college that I'm doing in another language which I don't speak, so obviously not passing that ****, so ****. **** it all! **** everybody! 23 ****ing years trying, and this is my reward. More ****ed up **** telling me basically life WILL get worse, in a matter of months, I won't even have a roof over my head.

Hello Erablez: I'm sorry to read of your struggles... so much sadness & difficulty all at the same time. I send warm thoughts your way with the hope that you will be able to find the inner strength to persevere.

I'm sorry about your dad. I hope you can resist the coke as that will not make your situation any better. I can understand your concerns as I face homelessness at some point too. Take it one step at a time.

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It helps to share your feelings, rather than doing drugs or whatever. Please, keep sharing your feelings here. I'm sorry things are so bad for you.

Hey, I'm so sorry about everything. Take a leave of absence from school. you have plenty of time to finish up. There's no way you can do school and be with your dad. don't be tempted to do coke, my ex was an addict and it destroyed his life, got caught drinking too...you dont want the law involved on top of all this. Can you go to a health center and see if they offer mental health services so you can talk to a therapist? I just don't know how you can go through this alone without help. seek help, its there.

I am in a place where they get a big share of their main funds to survive through foreigners, but where somehow, the English language knowledge is so damn limited as ****! And I don't even want to see any therapist, I AM SICK AND TIRED of this crap you have NO IDEA all the **** I've through! It doesn't ****ing end!! If I have one, JUST ONE good day, it's followed by a whole MONTH of issues! I can't even hope that things will get better, because they won't. And if they do, I know it's only a sign of the worst. I'm just tired. I literally don't even feel anything anymore cuz of all I've been through. My dad? He's dying and guess what? I don't feel nothing! I don't even slightly feel bad, when I first knew about a month ago, I did, but everybody thought it's not so serious, and now that we know it is, I feel like I don't give a ****. Not just him, about uni, about anything at all, I literally just don't care what happens anymore. That's how bad it is. That's how tired I am of 23 years and I don't exaggerate of living each and every minute of every day in fear and worry and loneliness. I'm probably pulling the plug pretty soon. I barely even ate anything in 3 days. And I don't ****ing care about that either. You know I thought sharing would make me feel better but for the first time, it's just making me angry and I don't even know why! I just want it to be done!

oh my!!! i hope you can feel better without doing drugs. i know right now you seem hopeless but it could get better too. good luck

I am so sorry to hear about your dad. It's a coping mechanism that you don't feel anything. The Coke is not helping your situation. Spend as much time (if you can with your dad). You will be glad you did in the long term. Can you get in contact with some support services that may help you in dealing with not having your house taken away. Best wishes

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