[Robyn222]

<font color="#880000"> </font> I actually have a profession but cannot seem to break into it at this time. Plust so many of the jobs available now are just horrible and they could not pay me enough to do them. The health field is putting its bucks only toward the most needy and that is not the population I work best with.

So I sludge along with these call center jobs plus an annuity that lasts for only 2 more years and I worry. I barely have enough money to live on. I have a house I love to death and cannot bear to part with. So I WORRY! Losing my house would not be something I could deal with; part of my soul would die if I lost it. I found out I need to refinance now instead of a year from now so I am frantically cleaning up my credit bureau info.

My dog died just over 2 years ago and I mourn him every day. I am all alone and I feel that my life is a never ending rut of the above. Never having enough money, never having love, never having my most beloved Beau back (I tried getting another dog and it was a disaster--when you have a truly fabulous dog anything less only reminds you of the dog you once had). I am always sad and underemployed. My meds are working pretty ok for a change. But my life just never changes. If I were in my 20s life would change because things are always going on at that age--but now? All I have is loneliness, loss, sadness, money woes, forget retirement!, and NO WAY OUT! Every year I say this is the end. It will end.. But it doesn't end. I search for jobs every day. Nothing that pays decently is there.

Do I feel hopeless? You bet. And I think I have every reason to see the situation as hopeless. Nothing ever changes. Every year is the same. My life is a failure that I have to live through for decades more. Alone, broke, and in grief. I see no end to this hell. Really I don't. I am tired up bucking myself up only to see the months change to years and that the situation is the same.

Alone, hopeless, old, sad, broke, scared all the time; a broken life......and having a life sentence here to life with this hell till the day I blessedly die.

[ab1018]

((((Robyn)))) Keep trying with the profession. Another member (Direction) brought up a head hunter to me. Have you looked into that?

The job market is tough right now - I just found a job paying 1/3 less than what I was making. I sent out about 50 resumes replying to job ads and got 3 interviews and one offer. Not trying to be discouraging, but you just have to keep at it.

I have a feeling you won't lose your house. You sound like a survivor that won't let that happen. Call centers are tough jobs - everyone seems to think they are easy - I now know differently (worked at one for several months between jobs).

Hang in there - it will get better - I promise.

[Direction]

Did someone mention me

Sounds like a lot is going on all about NOW...GRRRRRRRR! I agree keep trying with the profession...PM me the profession...I may be able to suggest other ideas.

RUT

Reoccuring
Uniform
Trap

[sharon1510]

This is actually the first time I have responded to anyone. What you said is exactly how I feel. I also have a "profession" but unable to work because of my depression. None of my "so called" closest friends even want to discuss my situation. I have bills coming in and i just can't work, I don't know what I'm going to do either.
It's just a mess. I also have no one in my life.

I'm just so tired of all this stress and no one to talk to. Friends just don't seem to get it and even if they do, they don't want to talk about it. I think they're afraid you're going to ask to borrow money. Which I have never done.. I desperately need to get back to work and I just can't .I don't know what I'm going to do.

Your last sentence - Alone, hopeless, old (kind of), broke, scared and a broken life with also nothing to look forward to except a life of pain also until the day I die.

It's so very sad, isn't it?