[Hefalump]

As part of my CbT I'm supposed to be logging negative thoughts but today has been a day so full of negativity towards myself that I don't think my therapist would cope if I logged it all.

I feel as though there is no point in going on.
No point in doing Christmas
nothing to look forward to
No point in getting up
Might as well die
Might as well breat myself into pieces
I am stupid
I am stupid I am stupid I am stupid

[ABC1357]

Originally Posted by Hefalump

I am stupid
I am stupid I am stupid I am stupid

I'm on the same stage. I was told to start from just saying "I'm NOT stupid." I know, that doesn't sounds real. But at least, I feel I'm not totally stuck.

[Skeezyks]

[Frankbtl]

Hi Hefalump

I'm sorry that things are feeling so tough for you
But it is important to say things as they are, just like you're doing right now
Your therapist..........that's what they're there for..........to offer you help and understanding in the "exact place" you're in............it's not your job to hold back on saying things in the hope that it might make the sessions a little better for them..........the sessions are about you and helping you..........so yes, allow yourself what you deserve from them, hey?

And I know it can be so hard to break through negative thoughts..........sometimes they just are what they are........and telling yourself the opposite just ain't going to work at all, right?
Although I'd say that you have a real starting point in how you began the list.........you said you "feel as though there's no point.........." not "there's no point..........", and major kudos to you there!!
So maybe you could turn some of the others around, do you think?? As in "I feel like I'm stupid" instead of "I'm stupid".............and I can tell you depression and it's effects can make the most intelligent people feel completely stupid, but that doesn't make them stupid, or you stupid, anyone/everyone can lack focus/concentration ect in the midst of depression. Stupid doesn't come into it, deep down, underneath this, there is much more to you
Just keep holding onto the fact that these are feelings, not truth's, and remind yourself of that, hey??
Maybe in challenging the feelings you can come up with different truth's, but if not just know that there can be different truth's

And hey, maybe you can actually use some of those honestly expressed negative feelings to create some positives somewhere when you put them all together............
As in, maybe you don't see any point in getting up at times because there's nothing to look forward to.............so perhaps throw plenty of focus into the nothing to look forward to bit?? Even if there's something real tiny you can offer yourself to look forward to.........some extra "treat" or incentive you can focus on??
I mean you can mix up the statements any which way, if they can perhaps lead to something you can aim towards. Sometimes even the smallest shifts in perception can be big in the "bigger picture". Just try to stick with it, hey?? There can be hope

And stick with us as well, hey?? One step/day at a time..........you're not on your own in this

Alison

[Hefalump]

Hey Alison, thank you for this. It's really good to hear this. I'm in a really bad place at the moment, but it does help to know there are people alongside me.
Hef

[Fuzzybear]

[JustJace2u]

My therapist and I are slowly getting me to work on the CBT skills. She also wants me to keep a journal of my thoughts which are usually pretty negative as well.

[MommaD]

Hefalump, i accept that you feel stupid, but I don't think you are stupid. We beat ourselves up a lot (been there done that, still do) over things that are simply...human?
I know it sounds trite, but what would you tell someone you deeply loved if they said that about themselves? I think you'd probably cut them some slack, be supportive, compassionate, encouraging.
Could you give yourself just a tiny bit of the same kindness?
If not, could you accept just a tiny bit of kindness from us when we tell you you're not stupid? I hope so.
Sending you a virtual hug