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#1
Apr 10, 2017, 02:32 AM
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Since I was little, I never wanted to marry, never wanted children, never wanted a standard job, never cared for a house. Even now that I am an adult, I still care for none of those things. Since I was little, I wanted more than anything to travel space-- not merely to mid-orbit or within the solar system, but rather interstellar travel. But the world seems so confining and so competitive. Even in college, I only took an engineering major due to its relation to space as well as its income. It has not proven too difficult or necessary repulsive, but it just seems boring. In fact, every occupation or traditional way of life seems dull to me. The most miserable experience I could imagine is going another 80 years in a dull life.
The "little things" have never made me content. Every day is just more boredom after the next. When I was little, people would always say that it was just a "phase" and that once I got older that I would settle for a regular life, but there is nothing which makes me more miserable. I intend to travel in the future, sure. But even if I explored the entire earth, it is still far below even my remote dream of interstellar travel. The only thing that I do even enjoy out of life are stories. Every single day, all I commit to are looking through stories and stories, but compared to the actual experience, it is still miserable. So then what do I do? There is nothing else that I want out of life. Everything else seems shallow and uninteresting to me. Even the simpleness of modern cloths and modern architecture make me feel downright awful. One of the few styles that I do truly love, the Victorian era (which I am referring to strictly the style, not the government or economy of that period) died out quite a long time ago. It seems like everyone that I love is literally out of reach, is fictional, or has simply died out. |
 *Laurie*, Fuzzybear, MtnTime2896, subtle lights
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#2
Apr 10, 2017, 03:22 AM
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Hello, Krow. You have made choices. Now you are living by them.
There are different choices. Last edited by Rizzar; Apr 10, 2017 at 07:04 AM. |
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#3
Apr 10, 2017, 10:10 AM
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"Different choices"?
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#4
Apr 10, 2017, 11:54 PM
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Hi Krow, thank you for sharing your story. And yeah, this is not an easy question. It can feel painul to see your dream so impossible to be realised. I don't know what to say..But what I admire here is your commitment and pouring your energy into learning about all this, exploring. I think this is so inspiring.
I don't know though what the future can bring, but I believe that you don't need 80 years to wait to be in a state of flow and experience moments of great passion and inspiration. It might be even interstellar travel. We define our universe and life and everything in this linear way where in the present moment we see our past and future only possibly defined in relation with our present moment, based on what we believe now, how we see the world now. And we live in this experience of linear continuity. But what if that's an illusion? Looking from that perspective, life is not so limiting anymore. In the same time, exploring what is in the present and what we can have now and enjoy now, seems to bring contentment usually. But sometimes one needs a more zoomed out perspective.. Hope this made sense, no worries if not. Dissappointment is painful feeling and sorry you are experiencing it now 
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 Krow
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#5
Apr 11, 2017, 02:13 AM
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Hi,
Interstellar travel is not feasible now. And it will not be in the near future. To aspire interstellar travel would be similar to aspire a miracle
__________________
Clara Hope is definitely not the same thing as optimism. It is not the conviction that something will turn out well, but the certainty that something makes sense, regardless of how it turns out. Vaclav Havel |
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#6
Apr 11, 2017, 04:14 AM
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Quote:
Lewis Carroll It's just a way to see the world. Anyway, I do agree that it's not helpful for one to live only in their aspirations because ultimately happyness should happen here and now. Or they say. But I would not ever deny "impossible dreams" because those can be a really creative force in the world.... |
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#7
Apr 11, 2017, 09:09 PM
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I just wonder why a miracle is the ONLY dream somebody can have. May it be because one knows is impossible? Being impossible could be less dangerous. The possible used to scare me
__________________
Clara Hope is definitely not the same thing as optimism. It is not the conviction that something will turn out well, but the certainty that something makes sense, regardless of how it turns out. Vaclav Havel |
| subtle lights
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#8
Apr 11, 2017, 09:39 PM
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could I suggest something ... it seems you have passion for this ... if you can not be there physically how about writing ... or better yet create art to express what your mind's eye see's ... maybe you can find what your seeking by going this other way ... I for one would enjoy seeing it ...
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| Krow
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This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
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My Support Forums is the online community that was originally begun as the Psych Central Forums in 2001. It now runs as an independent self-help support group community for mental health, personality, and psychological issues and is overseen by a group of dedicated, caring volunteers from around the world.
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