High Functioning Depression

Do any of you suffer from High Functioning Depression? I think that is what I have.

I try the natural path by taking St. John's Wort. I have been on several different types of antidepressants in the past and didn't like them.

I get out of bed every day and get myself ready for work. Shower daily. Financially independent. Reliable employee. Not a burden to society. Mind my own business.

If only people knew what I thought, what was going on in my mind . . . .

Coming from a low functioning depressive, I think that's great. Can you talk to your therapist about the dark thoughts you are having? Best wishes.

I went to a therapist last November. After two sessions, he told me I didn't need to come back. He said there was nothing wrong with me. He said I am self-efficient and self-assured.

Ummmm, I went to him because I was depressed, so yeah, I think there is something wrong with me.

(Although, I have to admit, him telling me that made me feel a little better. I realize he sees people way worse than me, but it doesn't mean I don't have issues.)

The current system of care is a joke , your "fine" until your in complete crisis and your entire life is unraveling , then they try and help , due to limited resources they dismiss people as fine until a major crisis, when in reality a little support can go along way to keeping crises from occurring in the first place , but because government wants to continue to cut funding of all social programs people don't get the support they need before a critical point ,depression is the leading cause of unemplyment and disability but waiting till a person is at that point is penny wise and pound foolish , just like they started rationing test strips to diabetics a few years ago , by doing so they save about $300,000 a year , but the cost of emergency and ICU intervention has gone up 2 trillion dollars and rising in the same period , so there is no actual saving , diabetics used to have access to supplies at any pharmacy , yet under the new system more than 74% of patients don't have access to needed supplies, we are going in the complete wrong way in both mental and physical healthcare , I suck at math but building up the military and sacrificing healthcare is ludicrous , they are going to run out of healthy people to serve , when the draft ended for Vietnam they were drafting 42 year old men because they ran out of anyone younger to serve ,we don't have the draft anymore but we don't have enough healthy people to serve as is because we lack the basic mental and physical care of a modern nation , we are the last super power , and we are one of the last countries without adequately funded healthcare for all.

Yes, I typically can function ok even when very severely depressed. This round has been more of struggle though. I'm still working and showering everyday, but when I'm not at work, I am in bed. It sometimes sucks because people don't understand how badly I'm actually doing.

Be careful. Take your condition more seriously than others do. I am not at all depressed today but have gotten depressed on and off since middle school including thinking of suicide romantically or fantasizing about it in order as an escape mechanism. I never missed or been late to classes or work. I cook 2-3 good meals a day (plus occassional snacks like juice), am good about doing most types of housework (always put off vacuuming for some reason), and only missed my 4.5 mile walk twice this year. When I made a serious attempt 2 years ago, everyone was shocked. Only my H and my psychiatrist (I only told the shrink on the first visit only--I went at 48 for the first time because I was seriously planning suicide and got really close) knew and when I attempted my H said he didn't really think I would do it. It's is a miracle I survived. Depression is as dangerous as heart disease and cancer. More doctors should understand this. Or maybe they look the other way as a method of CYA or just because time is money. Just because you function doesn't mean it is not serious. One attempt can end it all. And when we feel really bad, we don't care or see that clearly at all. It is just as serious when we are employed and all that.

I too have high functioning depression. Mine usually starts out with anxiety and it gets more sever if not helped and then the depression comes. I am scared and anxious about disappointing people. Like my boss and parents. When I do get into a depressed state I hide it from everyone so I can continue to try and make them happy. Good employee/daughter. Then the minute I'm alone I sob and self hate and pick on everything I've done wrong in my life. The stress of trying to be perfect is what makes me both high functioning but also depressed. For me it is a vicious cycle. But I hope you find comfort knowing your not alone.