[subtle lights]

I am dead inside, I want to be alive and myself, not dead and other people. I always become other people when with someone. I had done all kinds of stuff, meditation techniques, whatever to not get lost in others but doesn't help. Or maybe it's just projecting my issues on them.
I'm cofused.
I want to feel alive but for days now the world seems to be unreal to me.
Sorry for the rant.
I'm lost

Possible trigger:

Having these strong sui urges. If i can't be myself I don't want to live. But I don't like myself..so then, what

[Sunflower123]

Originally Posted by subtle lights

I am dead inside, I want to be alive and myself, not dead and other people. I always become other people when with someone. I had done all kinds of stuff, meditation techniques, whatever to not get lost in others but doesn't help. Or maybe it's just projecting my issues on them.
I'm cofused.
I want to feel alive but for days now the world seems to be unreal to me.
Sorry for the rant.
I'm lost

Possible trigger:

Having these strong sui urges. If i can't be myself I don't want to live. But I don't like myself..so then, what

Are you getting any help from a therapist or pdoc? You need support right now. I'm sorry you're having such a hard time and such strong urges. Please be gentle with yourself and stay safe even if you have to go to the ER. I might have mentioned this and I don't know how it works in Europe but there is a crisis line that you can text over here. It has saved me many times. I hope you feel better soon. If you need to talk I'm here.

[Skeezyks]

The Skeezyks offers his best wishes, subtle lights, with the hope that you will be able to find a pathway to a new life as yourself.

[Fuzzybear]

((((((( subtle lights )))))))