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Why I am still alive?

I always fall back. I always get worse.

Why am I still fighting?

Please hold on and keep fighting. I know how brutal it is. I've been there. You should keep fighting it because you are worth it and you deserve a good life. You just can't see it right now because of the filter of depression through which you are seeing everything. Also, when we are in a depression, we think we've always been depressed and always will be. I feel like I've mentioned this to death and I apologize if I've already mentioned this but there is a text line 741 741 where you type hello and you can text with a crisis interventionist. It's really helped me when I was about to hit the delete button.

I'm here to support you and to talk if you need me. I'm sorry you're having such a tough time.

Thanks guys.

I appreciate it Jennifer but I don't do crisis lines anymore. They can't help. It's not their fault. No one can help me. It's not anybody's fault.

I understand how you feel about crisis lines. I texted one (could have sworn it was also 741 741) and the person who I got was very rude and didn't even want to talk to me. They ended the text conversation immediately and I was left feeling worse than I was. Maybe I got a bad person. Who knows. But it really made me feel like a burden.

I think you're still here because you have something only you can do. I know that sounds corny or lame but I truly believe that. You're very strong and resilient. I'm so sorry your life has been obstacle after obstacle and I really would like to believe that things will turn around for you.