what fules your depression?

what fuels your depression?

what makes it worse

for me, what fuels my depression, is the thought that so much of my life has been wasted.

so many experiences gone, so many years wasted

so many things undiscovered

and the thought that I just can't restart life and get all those years back

what fuels yours?

Mine is triggered by interacting with toxic people; i.e., constant complainers, mean people, unstable personalities, dishonest, etc.

Thoughts that I still unemployed while my classmates and friends are all in job or had their business.

Anxiety

Mean people

I have an underlying severe depression but I get situational depression that usually revolves around my inability to get things done and disagreements with a moody relative.

When I'm alone with my thoughts for too long and it really hits me just how alone I am, there it is. When I can't do something right/at all and become discouraged. Dealing with people who have no warmth in their hearts. Anxiety exacerbates it, too.

People who have no warmth in their hearts ...

physical pain

right now, disappointment

The feeling that I will always be alone and no one can understand me.
That because I've been such a loner my whole life I've created a world inside me which I cannot share with anyone.
Wasted life.
Constant anxiety.
Feelings of powerlessness which I've had since I can remember.

Boredom often gets me. I find when I am busier and have more going on in life, I am happier. Having a part-time job has made a huge difference, as well as regular exercise.

I feel like I have situational depression and there are times when I have underlying depression. I would say that situational depression is a lot more common for me.

I am very sensitive, so I can get my feelings hurt easily. A small negative comment can bring me down very much; never mind what a huge negative comment can do to me. Also, seeing hospital pictures. Just the setting of one enough as it is, but a lot more so if someone is featured in the news as being a patient. And even greater if someone I care about is in the hospital.

I feel depression greatly every Sunday Morning when I wake up before getting out of bed. I guess it's because I feel the need to go to church; and I have not found one I like. I get over that depressed feeling as Sunday goes on and wonder how did I break out of that bad feeling.

Negative unsupportive people is the main thing
I get little bouts when I'm reminded of something sad from the past or if I start thinking about something sad too long

I think their's something about sundays. I do.

I used to fly in to terrible rages on a sunday, regardless of how I felt during the rest of the week

and why?

just because it was a sunday. no reason other than that.

really hard to control rages too

For me, it is rejection and the loneliness that comes with it. Being isolated with only my thoughts, leads to a dark road every time. Struggling to figure out how to cope with feeling this way.

I used to get really down on Sunday afternoon/ evenings. I've always hated the thought of having to force myself through a fixed schedule Monday-Friday. I guess it started with school and after that continued throughout the years I've been working the "standard" 9 to 5 jobs. I'm afraid I'll have togo back to that again and that already gives me suicidal thoughts.
Though I do need some schedule and discipline in my life (apparently), but I'd like it to be about something that wouldn't feel like a torture for once. Something that takes in consideration my needs and where I don't feel powerless and overwhelmed

Currently: Nightmares, unemployment, hallucinations or lack thereof, paranoia and not knowing whether it's justified.

And a lot of other things. Just getting out of bed I wonder why I should. When I stay in bed my thoughts dictate that I'm a waste of space. When I eat, I don't deserve it because I didn't work for it.

Hell, everything's fueling my depression lately.

Not being in control of my future because of my health and unemployment. No family support and having government programs decide my future. I'm also recovering from another abusive marriage.