[OliverB]

I thought I had enough rarities in my life having DID, meeting the criteria for schizophrenia for years and now residual, ...

I am suffering from depression right now...

Today I saw my therapist. We talked about college issues and failure. It seems I am rare between the gifted people. I am rare because it seems I am above highly gifted. I keep passing examns without seriously studying while I am in one of the hardest programs of my country.

I am suffering from apathy, hopelessness and anxiety because everything is so easy and boring. Even getting a perfect mark feel like nothing because I almost don't do anything to pass them. I don't feel any reward.

I feel weird, rare in a bad sense.

[Rohag]

Originally Posted by OliverB

I don't feel any reward.

This can be an aspect of depression.
Has nothing helped?

Looking beyond the exams, do you have or have you had any goals?

[Fuzzybear]

[Sunflower123]

I'm sorry you're having such a tough time. I agree with Rohag. This sounds like the depression talking. I also think the idea of making some challenging goals for yourself would be good. I hope you start feeling better soon.

[OliverB]

Thank you,

beyond the examns I guess the goal is to finish this degree, but I feel nothing. I am not attached to this world with normality.

[leejosepho]

Originally Posted by OliverB

... It seems I am rare between the gifted people. I am rare because it seems I am above highly gifted...

I am suffering from apathy, hopelessness and anxiety because everything is so easy and boring. Even getting a perfect mark feel like nothing because I almost don't do anything to pass them. I don't feel any reward.

I feel weird, rare in a bad sense.

My own level of giftedness is not nearly as high or extreme, but I do know the ill feeling you are mentioning and there have been times in the past when I have tried various things to bring myself down to a more-normal ability level shared by others.

Maybe you have heard something such as what Uncle Ben said to Peter Parker in Spider-man: “With great [ability] comes great responsibility.” Discovering how to make good use of what you have is obviously not so easy, but the reward when you have done so will be great!

[tippitippi]

It's lonely and confusing for me to feel different. In a way I like it because I can give up which I want to do . But it is overall better when I find common ground with people which is why I'm here. There's always a common thread because we're all wired almost the same in a way. Like when I have OCD issues I'll think well everyone has a bit of obsessive thinking. Everyone has a bit of something.

I guess I struggle to remind myself that I'm not the only person with my issues whatever they are. It's a big world and if I can easily find people like me on this forum alone then imagine how many others exist.

[OliverB]

I had a therapist that put me out of the inner world I self locked up, but he went away 18 months ago. I was left outside without anyone I could trust, I was assigned another therapist I never felt he was my therapist. I was put out of a hole and left alone in the middle of the forest.

I return inside, where it is safe. I don't want to know anything about the outside.

[MickeyCheeky]

Sorry you're feeling this way. I can relate a bit to what you say..