Self criticism

Do you think this is something that can be changed?

Any thoughts or suggestions (aside from meds, hotlines and therapy) are very welcome

this is a good question fuzzy...nothing can be changed if you don't examine it...I need to be clear in my mind about what I DID WRONG...my behavior..this is a very tough question...

I really wish that one day we all worked hard enough to be free from (most) self critisism.

Hugs!

I agree, and I wonder how this important work is done

Exactly! Nothing can be changed if we don't examine it

I don't know.

I speculate indirect, non-verbal interventions such as "meditative movements" (Tai Chi, Yoga) and "sand play" might (?) be valuable in supporting more direct approaches to the challenge of toxic self-criticism.

I have no personal experience with any of those non-verbal interventions I mentioned.

For me,much of my self criticism comes from all the things I was taught,told and believed about myself in childhood that repeats in my mind.

Yes,I believe it's something that can be changed with alot of work.I started a journal just to work on that kind of stuff.I wrote down each believe and then challenged them.For example believing that I am worthless,I wrote about why I was called that in chiodhood,how it made me feel,how I believed it,etc.Then I wrote about how I wasn't worthless,I was just a child,there was something wrong with my parents that made them make me feel and believe I was worthless,it wasn't true.

What helped me more than anything was/is comparing myself to any other random child and knowing no child is worthless,useless,stupid,etc.and knowing I am NOT all the things I have believed.It's hard to change all that old stuff that replays in my mind but it has got much better with challenging them.

I don't know when or where or why you learned all your self criticism,but knowing is a good place to start.

I think sometimes we are our worst crittict. We need to figure out how to love ourselves like our pets ��.

One thing that helps me is treating myself as I would a close friend. If my friend said, "I can't do anything right," I would list all the positive things she does; so I list the positive things I do. If she were beating herself up for making a mistake, I would help her put the mistake in perspective and remind her that everyone makes mistakes; so I do the same for myself. I'm not perfect at this, but it makes a big difference.

Another thing that helps is to talk to someone who knows me well and really listen to positive feedback. Even though my reflex is to reject it, instead I try to take it in. I respect this person's opinions about other things--why wouldn't I respect her opinion of me?