[Turtle_Rider]

Through I'm suicidal, I actually against it. I'm quite lost on these days. Usually, I'm able to distract it, but not for these days.

So, what makes you keep going on this life? Maybe reading those could help me calm down a little.

[Raindropvampire]

Because it means I give up and I let life win and I refuse to give up.
Plus I was brought up to believe in an afterlife so what's the point? You're just trading one life for another that's not guaranteed to be better.

Sorry you are feeling so bad right now

[starryprince]

My mom. Although I don't want to think about when she's physically not in this earth anymore because then there'd be nothing to hold me back. I hope you feel better.

[lotusblossom19]

I guess I'm still trying to figure out why I was put here in the first place. I guess a small part of me wants to believe I'm here for a purpose and since nothing/no one has taken me out yet, my purpose has not been fulfilled and my time to go hasn't come. Sorry you're feeling like this and I hope the feeling passes soon. You're welcome to message me anytime. I am available to listen and to care.

[MickeyCheeky]

Sorry you're feeling suicidal right now..

[Kiwiprincess1991]

I am sorry you are feeling this way...
Sometimes when those thoughts cross my mind I think about my Cat, my husband, and my parents and sister. What would they do without me? How would they feel that moment when they realise I am never coming back....
That scares me more than anything.

I hope you are doing better. I am here if you need to talk to someone

[Turtle_Rider]

Thanks all... still down, but still trying to coping up.

For me, I would say that my fear of death is greater than how painful life is for me.

I want to live as long as possible and I even place hopes in modern science to enhance my lifespan well beyond the current average because I'm scared of dying.

I fear being among the billions of other people who are dead and nobody cares about or remembers. I fear being considered insignificant and invalid by other people.

I also fear what is beyond death if there is even any life after death. If there is a such thing as a hell or if reincarnation is real and people who have done bad things in their life get reincarnated into worse lives, than I know that I'm going to hell or being reincarnated into some random peasant in the dark ages or something because I've done some pretty bad things just to try to survive. If there is no afterlife than the fear of not existing anymore almost as terrifying to me.

[passionfruit3]

I guess I would say I would give both a chance I want to live and get better or I want to die and be and be at peace I give myself a chance to live as I'm alive but if I die from suicide i figure I was meant to die and be at peace

[Smileonmyface]

my husband, children, and pets. i don't know who would take care of them if i were gone. even though i often feel like not so great a mother, i don't want my kids not to have their mother at all.

[Sunflower123]

I promised my daughter she wouldn't lose me that way. It would devastate her and be like throwing a grenade into her life. Some days I've fought really hard to keep that promise but I have. I hope you start feeling better soon. Thinking of you.

[IrisBloom]

I have grown kids and grandkids. I sometimes think my not being here would make much difference. But when they need me or want me I am glad I am here. My youngest son called me at 2am. Who would he have called if I wasn't here? I'm sticking around to be here for them, but I also believe I have a purpose.

Some days are a struggle to get through. Other days are better. I believe each day you wake up is a blessing. I've said on here often: Find a purpose. It doesn't have to be huge. Something as small as smiling at a child can change someone's outlook on their day.

[Bird Feeder]

My children and grandchildren and to some extent ECT. I sometimes feel that I am bound to suicide because I've been dealing with the thoughts and actions for so long. If I could make my suicide look like an accident or such, I think I would suicide in a heartbeat.

[subtle lights]

My mother...she would be devastated...but I feel she is suffocating me, I need to live her life too...this is not easy to explain

There is some crazy hope in me that by staying here I might add something to the world and help people.

I think I'm too infatuated with myself deep down..

The memory of beautiful moments, the beauty in the world

The fact that my imagination always creates some kind of hopeful future

Some spiritual ideas...but this is complicated

Sometimes I wish I could just swipe away all these

[MatBell]

Not much for me, I'm afraid. The last 48 hours haven't been good. I like the thought of disappearing from everything.

Originally Posted by Smileonmyface

my husband, children, and pets. i don't know who would take care of them if i were gone. even though i often feel like not so great a mother, i don't want my kids not to have their mother at all.

This is exactly how I feel. I am scared of dying now.

[sadandlonelyinspain]

I'm afraid of the physical pain and of disappearing, I'm afraid I would mess it up and end up in the hospital with brain damage or something of the sort, or that it would work and whatever little chance there is of my life getting better would be gone. And my cat would probably die without me because my mother doesn't take proper care of her.

[sadandlonelyinspain]

Hope you feel better

[JustTvTroping]

I didn't want any potential pain to be the last thing I ever feel. I'm a music lover and an epicurean (in training) to a somewhat uncomfortable degree. I guess I just appreciate my senses too much to let go now.

[Unrigged64072835]

My husband and daughter. They would be shattered if they found me.

[Fuzzybear]

A small paw full of special people in my life

[sugarbeeMe]

I made a promise to myself long ago. I want to keep my promise.

[wiretwister]

meds are keeping me level ... but when I was at the edge ... my you tube find ... made the difference between life and death ... nothing else could reach me ... but she did ... still does ... look for it ... you might get lucky and find it ... I pray you do ... Tigger .

[Nammu]

The thought of strangers handling my body and doing an autopsy.

Originally Posted by Nammu

The thought of strangers handling my body and doing an autopsy.

This is perhaps a reason why I'm considering getting myself cyropreserved. I have a chronic fear of autopsies so when I get the money I plan on opening a life insurance policy on myself to get my body cyropreserved upon my death. Since autopsies interfere with the cyropreservation process, many people who become cryonics members make regular documented videos of themselves discussing their opposition to autopsies and make it clear in their wills that they do not want to be autopsied no matter the circumstance.

Well that and I also hold onto some hope that sometime in the next 50-100 years, they will find a way with new science and technology to both revive people who's brains remain preserved and restructure and rewire the brain to cure people of any and all mental illness.

Yes I put hope into things that are completely far-fetched but the possibilities of the future is the only thing that makes me care about life at all. Even if such things don't happen, I would take my ideas and fantasies over the darkness and despair that surrounds the "real" present world.