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#1
Oct 19, 2007, 02:33 AM
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To everyone who told me to enjoy my 'numb' phase while it lasted... you were all absolutely right. Before I knew it everything came rushing back and I now so wish to be numb again. Nothing feels right. I live in constant fear (of what? I don't know) every single minute of the day. I'm paranoid, holding back tears all the time, and I can't help but feel sorry for everyone.
When I used to feel miserable I still felt like I was sturdy... that I could take a beating and still come out standing... but now I feel so fragile like if I'm feeling really bad I want to cower in a corner or hide under my blanket. Last week I think I was on the verge of a breakdown. I panicked and came to the conclusion that I think I really do need help in order to survive. I finally researched some therapists in my area and was very shocked and disappointed to see how much they charged. I knew they would be a little pricey but I still didn't expect what I found. I kind of mellowed out since then but if I have another breakdown like that I might just have to fork up the money anyways. Sorry for the long rant.
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Birds fly over the rainbow. Why then, oh why can't I? |
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#2
Oct 19, 2007, 08:25 AM
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Anony, hope a little sleep and a new "day" has helped your feelings change a bit so you don't feel so bad.
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"Never give a sword to a man who can't dance." ~Confucius |
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#3
Oct 19, 2007, 09:21 AM
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 - Anony I added this picture because it sounds like you were here typing right along with me , You said all the words I've been feeling and you helped me as well - I never thought of the word ' Numb ' and it helped me see thats what I've been feeling - Thank You , you gave me something to work with now
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I have found that 3 minutes of non-stop writing can be very helpful and it does not matter what topic you start with just don't stop , and if you find your going off the topic it does not matter and going over 3 minutes is fine . Try it - You'll be amazed at what you can find out about yourself --- Just Write --- |
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#4
Oct 19, 2007, 10:28 AM
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(((((((((((((((( Anony ))))))))))))))))))
 
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#5
Oct 19, 2007, 01:44 PM
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Thanks Perna, DrummerGirl, and Fuzzybear for responding. I do feel a little better today, thanks. I'm glad my little rant helped you out DrummerGirl. It's always nice to know that you're not alone in feeling the way you do.
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Birds fly over the rainbow. Why then, oh why can't I? |
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