I hate this

I hate my head. I hate the way I am. I hate what I do. I just want it to stop.

I had a bad night. I very nearly did something “stupid.” My girlfriend talked me out of it. She really wanted me to call the crisis team but I kept refusing. Eventually I fell asleep for a couple of hours.

Now I’m just wondering what the big deal is. I’m ok. I will probably spend the day convincing her, and myself, I’m fine and don’t need help...

I think I was just being overdramatic. I’m fine. Except when I’m not.

((((((Skye)))))))

(((((( Skye ))))))

Please be safe.


WC

Thanks. I’m trying to keep it together and see if I can ride it out. Tonight I’m tired. I haven’t been sleeping enough lately. I don’t help myself. Must do better.

Does berating yourself help you do better? . I’m just wondering because I suspect the MH “team” (UK) is likely to berate people

GRRRRRRRR at them if they do

Be safe today and if you need help get it

((Skye))

I have felt like this lately too, Skye. It's very difficult and scary when you have those super down days that dip into the unsafe zone. I'm always fearful I'll stay in that zone and I'm always so relieved when the next day is "normal". The roller coaster is frightening

When you have thoughts like that it is never over dramatic! Even if this only hapends once. I have been there several times in my life and did end up over that very fine edge. Thankfully the man upstairs still has a plan for me, otherwise I would have been gone a long time ago. If you have these thoughts you need help to find out why, and to try to fix the problem. If you are seeing someone, you need to tell them you have thoughts like these, so they can help you. No offence to you, but you don't need to put this type of fright on your loved ones. It can make them turn away, because they can't handle it, don't know what to say to help you, ect. I am glad you reached out here, but you may need more than this site.

Please read my reply to wisperingsky, because I feel the same for you!!!!!!! These feelings can be very dangerous, and family, and friends may not be able to handle these strong destructive feelings.

No berating doesn’t help, but I always feel like it’s my fault, and to a certain extent it probably is. Thankfully my cc doesn’t do tooo much berating, but does try to push me to do more things to help myself, in a friendly way.

It is scary. You just never know when it is going to hit. Those nights seem to be becoming more frequent, and it probably won’t be long until I stay in that zone for a longer period of time. That’s just the pattern this thing seems to take for me.

I hope you feel better soon who

My care coordinator is aware that things are going downhill fo rme. I see her again next week.

I’m lucky to have a girlfriend who understands as she struggle with her mental health at times too. It’s taken me a really long time to be able to open up to someone and not just bottle it up. And while I understand where you are coming from, that isn’t really a helpful statement for me as it won’t take much for me to stop talking again, and that never ends well for me.

Anyone who says bad things to you: They don't know what you've been through. They don't know. Just listen to your heart.

I am so sorry! That is the last thing I would want. I very much understand about how long it can take just to say a very little. I am 52, and only seriously started working on my issues in the last few years. Again I am so sorry if I over stepped my bounds. Please don't stop because of what I said, because who am I? Just another person in this life with my own MI. I haven't been to school for Psy. therapy, or anything in that line in the field. Again I am so sorry!!!!!!!

Hey its ok, no harm done it’s easy to take things the wrong way online! And in real life for that matter!