[fudgecakes]

My parents abused me, my siblings just watched. It was targeted abuse. I was forced to escape my family (they were insane, deserve death penalty) and get my own place. I lost all my friends since my parents abused me so badly I became physically handicapped so I can't go out and see people.

I have no friends IRL. No family. Only got friends online.

I am too old for a parent since I'm an adult, 22, now, but I feel I need to get to know someone who I can trust, someone who won't abuse me. Someone I can call and get help from when things get bad. I'm not depressed but just very sad about this. My parents abused me since I was a young teen. I just have a longing for someone to be my close friend and just be a decent person simply. I'm just thinking in general... it doesn't feel right. I feel all alone and I wish someone could help me. I am handicapped, I have no one to turn to. Where should I go? To a church or something?

What should I do?

[MickeyCheeky]

It seems like you might benefit from a therapist. Can you afford it? I'm so sorry you've been abused so much

[Rohag]

Fudgecakes, do you have access to a social worker or to an agency that could direct you to the right kind of assistance?

United Way Tocqueville?
United Way France?

[fudgecakes]

Thanks for your advice. I just wonder if there's any person who is not "hired" that I can talk to? Like a real "close" friend, not a hired one. Because I feel like it doesn't feel right that I don't have anyone to turn to when life gets really hard for just one person to deal with.

Originally Posted by fudgecakes

I just wonder if there's any person who is not "hired" that I can talk to? Like a real "close" friend, not a hired one. Because I feel like it doesn't feel right that I don't have anyone to turn to when life gets really hard for just one person to deal with.

I feel sad on your behalf, but if you don't have any friends you have to start building friendships. Sorry, I'm not trying to give you a lesson, just trying to present the hard truth: One may have to work hard to get friends in the real world.

I know this was NOT what you wanted to hear, but there is no other way (many of us has had to swallow that pill when we were younger, it's hard).

I recommend that you find a therapist to talk to at first. Then look at your interests. Do you have any or do you have to build up your interests as well. Take some time to think it over and then pick an interest that it would be OK to share with others, like swimming, if that is possible with your handicap, chess or something else. From such or other interests, it is possible to start building relationship. Teach yourself small-talk. Amazon has a book about that.

I know this is not what you wanted, but there is no quick way to build friendships. Be careful, some of us have had the experience that when we told about hurts form our past, people withdrew. I'm mentioning this not scare you, but to give you some facts about that it is not easy to be a surviver. When people haven't experienced what you have, such "things" might scare them and make them withdraw from you.

Make friends to share interests with and find somebody else to seek support from. You mentioned a church. If you believe in God, that may be an idea. Find a priest or deacon or somebody else that will keep your secret and be able to be there for you if you are in a crisis.

I send my best hopes for you! Please be realistic and start in the right end!

PS. People who either get paid for talking with you or volunteers, may be OK and respectful people. Please don't honor them with disrespect! Real friends do not grow on trees ....