could be a bad situ here.....

jrae · Mar 13, 2018, 07:44 AM

so I was gonna post this the other day, but got side-tracked and didn't get around to it. well, I gotta now.....

so I'm starting to get very concerned about this situation and its consequences/effects. long story short, my 97-year-old Grandma was just admitted to the hospital Monday, which was the second time in two and a half weeks!

I'm getting kinda scared cuz even though she is 97 years old, she was doing decent for her age. things kinda took a 'decent' downhill slide the past week and a half, where she went from being in an assisted living facility, to the nursing home, lost like ten pounds, and wasn't really eating or breathing too well! I saw her a week ago Friday and she was her usual self. but when I was in to see her on Saturday, it was like a complete 180! (just admitted to hospital for difficulty breathing)

she's a very special person to me, and not only because she's been my only grandparent for the past nineteen years! but she's also been the ONLY person who has never questioned me about my MI! in fact, I doubt she knows. she's never even questioned why I've been so "available" the past ten years; why I could show up for a visit with her any time of day or evening/night; and always saw me for the person I am, not the MIs I have!!!!!

there aren't a lot of things that truely scare me, but losing her would be one of them, cuz I just don't know how badly it will affect me! it could be a whole new bottom to the pit I'm already in.....

Wild Coyote · Mar 13, 2018, 03:04 PM

I am sorry your grandmother is not well.
I'd lost mine 18 months ago and I miss her terribly.

My heart goes out to you.

WC

Nammu · Mar 13, 2018, 03:33 PM

I didn't know my grandmothers, one died young and the other wasn't close. But I knew one of my great grandma and she was a blast. Miss her. My mum is 90 and her health can turn on a dime. I hope your grand mom recovers from this quickly.

jrae · Mar 13, 2018, 09:45 PM

it's no longer a "could be" => it's now an "IT IS".....

I went in to visit my Grandma this afternoon. my mom and older sister where there. and I was shell-shocked to hear them calling it "end of life care"!!!!!

it's just shocking how much has happened in the past two weeks. I mean my Grandma went from being in an assisted living, to early Friday morning she was moved over to the nursing home (which was literally the next building over), and Monday early afternoon she was at the hospital! from what I've heard, I guess she was more 'sick' than what she or others realized. (she hadn't been eating too well since like wed) I hadn't been kept informed on this, but so it goes.

I'm just floored -> I've been up to visit her three times in the past week and a half, and each time it's been remarkedly worse. today she could barely speak and just slept, and I was there for three hours!!!

Artchic528 · Mar 13, 2018, 10:02 PM

You have my sincerest sympathies. My grandmother died suddenly from a ruptured aneurysm on her aorta near her heart. Apparently, she stressed herself to the point where her blood pressure soared and her aneurysm grew. It happened so fast and felt so surreal.

Shortly after her death, her husband, Grandpa, went to join her. Died of a broken heart, they say, though his health wasn't the best to begin with.

I know what it's like to be close to your grandparents, and now my other set of grandparents are getting up their in years. I'm hoping to at least see them one last time before it's too late.

I hope you take care of yourself as in times like this, it's needed. Be there for your Grandma, because even though she can't speak, she knows you love her and are there beside her, offering her comfort in her remaining time here on this mortal coil.

I offer you hugs and my condolences in this trying time.

Mar 13, 2018, 10:19 PM

You have a very special grandma. It's wonderful when people can accept us as we are. I wish you some peace and comfort in this time, please take care of your needs, it's difficult to do at a time like this.

jrae · Mar 13, 2018, 10:32 PM

well, my grandpa (her husband) died before I was 4 years old, so I never knew him. I'm not even thirty-three years old and outside of four & a half years, my Grandma has literally been right next door my entire life! even when she moved into the assisted living eight years ago, I would call her and still say "howdy neighbor" & she instantly knew it was me! (I live outside of town but it takes less than ten mins to get there)

I'm not close with my family, not even extended family, outside of one aunt. my Grandma was like the exception! in fact just eleven days ago when I saw her, she still asked me how my head-scar/'baby'-hairs were doing, which I got back in Oct. 2015!!! but somehow she remembered and I thought it was funny how randomly she'd ask about my 'baby'-hairs!

and wanna share this story, which is something I've barely told anyone. my Grandma may not remember she did this FOR ME, but I do!
it was not quite twenty years ago, s**t going on with the family but who doesn't go thru that with teenage kids in the family. one day things were said and I just needed a break from them & it all, and went outside to sit in the barn with the cats (which is what I usually did). being it was getting close to dark and I didn't want to go back inside, I walked next door (which was literally just a path through the grove of trees) to my Grandma's house. even though I did not have my license (only a farm-permit), she let me drive her car to town!!! long story shortened, I stay at a 'friends' house for a couple hours, phone calls were exchanged as the rents tried to find me, and I spent the night at the pastors house. he drove me to school the next day and afterwards I try to pretend that nothing happened.
I have no idea what kind of 'h**l' my Grandma got for helping me, but she did it anyways!!!

And even now, I could go up and visit her and have no troubles being there over an hour. I doubt I could even do that with my own parents or siblings!!! (or for that matter, they could even sit one-on-one with me for an hour) I can/could go a month and outside of my parents (for various reasons), the only other person I even see in my family or relates is my Grandma!

we started this a while ago: She always says, 'thanks for coming to visit' - to which I reply 'thanks for being here so I came come visit'!

Nammu · Mar 13, 2018, 10:49 PM

She sounds very special.

WhatsNextNow · Mar 13, 2018, 11:13 PM

Aw, I'm so sorry about your Grandma. Do your best to remember those great times and great things about her, even if one second you are crying and the next you're smiling/laughing. Tell her all the things you want to say. It doesn't matter if she is able to respond - she hears you. Let her know you will be okay and that she is deep in your heart. Be well, dear.

dexter · Mar 13, 2018, 11:43 PM

Very sorry to hear this jrae. Good luck, find strength.

jrae · Mar 14, 2018, 11:08 PM

I heard tonight that I guess tomorrow morning, they will be moving her out of the hospital and back into her nursing-home room - something called final-care I guess!

jrae · Mar 16, 2018, 04:21 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by disparaissant

please take care of your needs, it's difficult to do at a time like this.

I don't know what that is.....

MickeyCheeky · Mar 16, 2018, 05:08 AM

jrae · Mar 19, 2018, 05:38 AM

she died Friday afternoon!

I've never been good at the whole "emotions" thing, and I'm a strong introvert. I'm pretty sure I don't know how to deal with something like this. I probably never have....