[MatBell]

I think when I most of all want to stay alone in bed and cancel plans, is when I should actually force myself to do them as best as I can. Somehow I usually am able to engage with the other person, forget about all the troubles for a short while, and maybe I might feel a tiny bit better after.

I know just staying alone perpetuates the negativity and hopelessness without doing anything about it. My therapist would say the same. Motivation doesn't come out of nowhere but from action, doing something. So I should meet up with my friend.

But man, at the moment I just feel like life has got me by the throat.
I was at a job interview yesterday. I don't think I will get it. I'm afraid I will sink so low if I get a no. Meanwhile the "job center" (what it's called here) is pulling me in so many directions and having some many requirements and admin it's so overwhelming.
I don't know how long I can be in this state. My head is just in a pretty dark place right now. Trying to take it a day at a time.

[Angelique67]

Hi MatBel. All I can handle is like an hour at a time. But I agree that when you just want to stay in by yourself you should go hang out with a friend.

[MatBell]

Originally Posted by Angelique67

Hi MatBel. All I can handle is like an hour at a time. But I agree that when you just want to stay in by yourself you should go hang out with a friend.

Yes I have to just think ahead some hours at a time or it all becomes too much snd I end up doing nothing but staring into space.

All I can say is, well, I think I know what you are feeling and have felt like isolating, giving up and staying in bed. Job hunting, worries about finances is a huge stress for you. Good for you if you can force yourself out with a friend. I was told as well, to act anyways, do something, but there are days I just feel I can't. Many days I feel were wasted, but depression is something most people don't understand. Hope better days come soon for you Mat.

[Angelique67]

Originally Posted by MatBell

Yes I have to just think ahead some hours at a time or it all becomes too much snd I end up doing nothing but staring into space.

Me too. After I stayed inside for a year I had to finally go to the clinic for med prescriptions and I was.so out of practice going anywhere that I had to make checklists of everything that has to happen before I can go. Some of the listed stuff was "comb hair", "pick out clothes" etc. Luckily now I'm not as definite about what I want to do. The only places I ever go to are doctors anymore.

[Shazerac]

Oh sweetie, I so hear you. Depression just sucks the bug one. I don’t have any magic answers for you. Just keep on keeping on. There are days when I want to stay in bed with the covers over my head.

[Wild Coyote]

Hi MatBell,

I hear you. I go through the same. I can relate to taking it an hour, even a moment, at a time.

I am sorry you are having a rough time.

I have found music very motivating, even inspirational.
If you're up to it, check out the song in my signature line.
I'd also suggest some Jason Mraz, as a lot of his music focuses on hope, is very upbeat.

I hope you get some relief soon!


WC