Can't be strong any more

Everyone (GP, podcast, therapist) tells me how strong I am because I manage to drag myself out of bed every day, and somehow do everything that is expected of me.
But I can't do it any more. I don't want to do it any more. I just want someone to hug me and tell me that I don't have to be grown up for a while, and I can cry and it will all be ok, except that will never happen.
Plus I have to be strong now, more than ever. My dad is dying - he has a couple on months at most left, and I just want to go to sleep and not wake up


My pdoc told me to increase my dose of escitalipram this week, even though I told her the dose I was on (10mg) made me really sleepy. Her response was that I have been feeling like that for a while. I took 20mg and felt like a zombie all the next day - but hey, what do I know.

I hope you find some level of peace. The med will help and it won't be so sleepy after a few days, at least how it works for me. This is a great place to vent and receive support.

Thank you for your reply. I don't have much hope about the medication, but at least I have a week off work this week so don't have to attempt to function normally.
My Dad is deteriorating quickly at the moment, as is my Granny but she is too far away for me to visit easily. Or that could just be my excuse for not wanting to watch someone else I love die...

The sleepiness caused by Meds will probably lessen once your body is used to it. Also being in a stressful situation can make you tired and sleepy. Watching someone you love die is incredibly difficult. My heart goes out to you. Please go easy on yourself. You have a lot on your plate.