[MickeyCheeky]

I'm feeling more and more like a failure, as days go by... I don't like my school, I'm not sure I can do it, but it seems like I have other choice, I'm stuck. Therapy isn't helping so much because I feel I can't be totally honest.

And the worst part is that it's all my fault - I'm doing all of this to myself, no one else is. Why do I have to be so stupid and incompetent? Why can't I be better? I deserve everything that's coming to me, I feel like I don't even have the right to complain. I'm sorry I have disappointed everyone

[Altarian]

I’m right there with you on feeling of failure. I’m sure you’re not stupid or incompetent but mind just is in a different place. Therapy don’t work with me because the moment I find someone I trust they leave. I try to talk to my wife but she doesn’t understand how my mind works. But this isn’t about me but about you and what you’re feeling inside. We are all our own worst enemy because we know exactly what to say to cause the most pain. Not going to give you a care bear happy “just love yourself” bs because I have a feeling it wouldn’t make you feel better. I don’t know what to tell you that would help since I don’t know you and things that bring any joy or close as you know of joy. Just know there are others out there who feel the same.

[MtnTime2896]

I'm not disappointed. I'm damn proud, actually. School has been hard on you, and yet, you're still fighting for it. And you hate it! Imagine if it was something you loved, you'd concur the world. You have a fight it you, my friend, and that's something to take pride in.

[Shazerac]

It’s not your fault, you are not incompetent, and yes you have every right to complain.

[MickeyCheeky]

Thank you so much for your support and kind words.

It saddens me to see you be so hard on yourself. I can tell you are a beautiful person. To be hurting and take the time to help so many others on here takes a special kind of strength and selflessness. You are neither stupid nor incompetent and these moments will pass. One moment at a time. You got this.

[Wild Coyote]

(((((( MickeyCheeky ))))))

[MickeyCheeky]

At least I could say that I try my best. But I don't think it's enough

[muggleborn22]

Originally Posted by MickeyCheeky

I'm feeling more and more like a failure, as days go by... I don't like my school, I'm not sure I can do it, but it seems like I have other choice, I'm stuck. Therapy isn't helping so much because I feel I can't be totally honest.

And the worst part is that it's all my fault - I'm doing all of this to myself, no one else is. Why do I have to be so stupid and incompetent? Why can't I be better? I deserve everything that's coming to me, I feel like I don't even have the right to complain. I'm sorry I have disappointed everyone

We're all right with you in this struggle! I feel the same way, its when people say "oh just cheer up it's ok". We understand you, It sounds to me like you are doing something. Going to school and trying to get help.

[Candy1955]

'Not enough' is often a black hole we fall into when we are worn down, scared or facing the unknown. Don't get sucked into it. I've dug out of that hole over and over my whole life. Think of that as out side of you, and you may manage it more easily. Like 'not enough' is NOT inside you, but rather it's an actual place you can avoid...

[MickeyCheeky]

Thank you. You're right, I use that phrase a lot. I guess I just struggle with expectations.. from myself or others.. I'm just afraid to disappoint everyone, which is probably why I can't talk about this with friends or family.