[KathyP]

I have wrote about one sister in law which there is no way we can help her...She loves living in the gutter.
But I have one that my heart is breaking and I just am at a brick wall when it comes to finding her help.
It started 5 yrs ago when their oldest brother died of cancer. Before he died he world go to Bev's House and sit with Bev and her family (husband and little girl) and another sister that at the time was battleing cancer the same as him. And their Mother who would come and spend a week or so with her. But every week end Mother was there for sure.
Well, Veron died and it was hard. Then a about 2 yrs later The other sister died.. Which hurt Bev something terrable. She told me she lost her sister and her best friend.. Well, Bev's husband was going to these doctors which started out to be a scam to get SS and ended up where they did all this ****** to him he really became sick.. Pills omg there was every drug in that house you can imagine.....
Well, after Seal died Bev went to a Psh. and this doctor is no longer allowed to pracise in our County. So, she drives 20 miles to see him and he has had her on what we call xanx bars. The xanx that look like a long skinny bar. well, she takes 6-8 a day that is prescribed this way. Now at one point she was taking them all in a half month. then be calling around tring to find more....Anyway back to why I am writing...
So, for 5 yrs now she sleeps all the time and this last year she has been presribed sleeping pills anti-depressants along with the xanx bars. The little girl who is 13 now has been basically raising herself cause both mother and farther have really been asleep!
Last winter her husband started going crazy from the different pills that again was prescribed to him. He held them at gun point he had friends that wasn't there they he talked to and made comfortable...Then one night the little friends made him mad and he shot them up and killed them . The police came and they committed him. Bev stayed here with me and her little girl. You see where she has been asleep all these years her house is being condemmed. It is that bad. Well, I sent the little girl to another state to live with a older sister. And Bev went to her nasty house that use to be so pretty and clean. She was drinking stright wiskey on top of all the meds. and just layed on her couch there.
Well she wanted her girl to come back home and she made her come back. With the promise of going to go get help. Well, when they left my home I found out that they had infested me with Lice. Well, at x-mas time they lost their Mom too. Then a month and half ago she lost her husband. He died while he was committed to a nursing home. Heart attack. After his death
She told me that she would go get help that her Psh. was going to help her commit herself so she could get better to take care of this little girl.
Family came in from out of state this week and my husband had a family cook out. I went over 2 times yesterday and she was on lthe couch and wouldn't even look at me she said YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND I DON'T FEEL GOOD." I brought the little girl with me.
After everyone left. I told my husband...About his sister...
She was shaking so bad she was sweating and she is so pale anwhite. She has not took a bath since her husband died. Her hair is natted together and infested with lice. When she gets up to walk which is rare she trembles and falls.
He was mad and we went to go see her. And when he took one look at her he broke down and cried. He pleded with her to go get help.
She is so depressed that I am scared that she is dying. I have never in my life seen someone that really has no reason to live in their minds. She knows she needs help. But she can't get off the couch long enough to go get it. She drinks the SS check up and welfare pays for the pills. So, it is an endless supply. Which I know that she can not go with out them till she seeks help.
If I can see the condition of this woman why can't her doctor see it? I know that they have their ways to have someone committed. But yet he gives her more pills and she is sliding farer farer farer down this hole of depression. Instead of helping it is worst than ever!
I have seeked help and they tell me until she comes in to the hositpal and says she needs help there is nothing the family cn do.
so, it is worst than watching someone die of cancer! I am watching this woman who's brain is so ate up from meds and booze and depression die....Cause there is no way she can make a descion in her life.
I see it destroing her little girl. I see the pain that her brothers and sisters have to know that there is nothing we can do...
Would you think I would beable to call her doctor and just tell him HEY YOU ARE HELPING KILL HER! And then maybe he would force her to commit herself....
Why did they take away the laws so that family can seek help for the mentally ill?
What can I do? Could someone please help me find the answers to save this woman who i know is still in there under all this deep deep dark depression!!!!!!!!!

[(JD)]

wow. I apologize for not being able to recall all you have written, my depression makes it hard to read and focus...

If you really want to get involved, there are those who can help you....

Can you take her to her doctor to see if that would find the result you think is best?

If not the above, have you suggested that someone -next of kin- asks for her to be declared incompetent?

Since she is collecting SS, isn't there a social worker assigned to her "case" that you can contact and find out options?

Do you have a County Information Line that you can call for resource information... or even online information?

Certainly, getting her help is primary, however, you can file a complaint about the child being neglected and that should get the attention if nothing else works.

To me, sounds like any thing that changes the situation would be better than what it is. good wishes.

<font color=blue> meditation is a true way to connect to the Source </font color=blue>

[KathyP]

GOOD NEWS...........
TODAY SHE WENT TO GET HELP. 2 OTHER SISTERS WENT AND SHE AGREED TO GO GET UP BUT WANTED TO CLEAN UP FIRST.. THEY CALLED ME SO I COULD DRIVE AND I KNEW MORE THAN THEY DID. i CALLED HER DOCTOR OFFICE AND GOT A RUN AROUND......FINALLY WAS TOLD TO TAKE HER TO THIS HOSITPAL TO HAVE SOMEONE SEE HOW BAD SHE IS......SO, DID THAT AND I TALKED TO THIS ER DOCTOR AND INSTEAD OF A REHAB SHE IS GOING TO BE PUT IN A PHARITAIC UNIT FOR THE DEPRESSION....... THAT WORKS TAKE CARE OF ALL 3 PROMBLEMS... BUT THIS ER DOCTOR AGREEDED WITH THE FAMILY IN THAT SHE NEED HELP RIGHT NOW.........AND SHE DIDN'T FIGHT SHE WAS HONEST AND I AM SO HAPPY TO KNOW THAT IT IS A START TO GETTING BACK A SISTER AND MY BEST FRIEND.........