my explaination

Most of the reasons I left here was because of our being in danger of losing our home because of back taxes. We've been jumping through hoops for months with no end to the issue. We now have to get a reverse mortgage and I'm scared to do this without my father. I can't totally rely on anyone ...I'm getting paranoid and very suspicious. All that stress combined with finding out for sure that my "family of origin" seriously hated me. Took me long enough to finally figure it out but I still have been given no reasons why. That's enough to make me question every move I make and every word I say. THe fact that we were living on very little money finally pushed me into IP. I was in there so long I was embarrassed to come back here. I'm still very overwhelmed and scared about many things.
I really wish I knew why my mother and father hated me....but I'm not sure I could handle the answer.

I am very sorry for what you're going through... I wish I could help... I hope things get better for you.

Lily, this is a lot of tough stuff. It doesn't matter what those people think or feel because they don't matter. They've lost you. It's really their loss and your gain is to be shed of them.
Don't be embarrassed to come here. I'll listen

I just got a thick envelope from my "brother's" lawyer for something to do with the mother's will. I found last year that I was disinherited. Why would they be wanting me to sign tings if I'm a non entity? Either I'm an heir or I'm not. They can't have it both ways. . That is a huge trigger. Anything to do with the brother is a huge trigger. I don't understand anything this paper work says. If the brother has his way, he'll make me look crazy. I'm terrified. I spoke to my T (Captain Obvious) and he said not to sign anything w/o a lawyer. DUH!

I'm shaking and panicked. I feel like hiding..... Why are they doing this to me?
If this is in the wrong place, I'm sorry.

Do get a lawyer to look at the papers. I know all this is tough.

I'm so glad I came back here. It feels safe. I wish I could explain the terror I feel when the brother makes any contact, even by way of his lawyer. He traumatized me. There isn't a night that goes by when I don't wake up from nightmares of him and the parents. I can't get any relief and I can't take it on top of all the other stuff.
Thank you all for understanding.

In the last 10 years, the brother has gas lighted me to the point where I doubt everyone and everything. I can't trust my own feelings or thoughts. He took over where the parents left off.

Think about what your boundaries need to be. We are all here for you Calla lily. Legal advice is your best option. You have rights and are just as important as your brother. Put the wind up his sails a bit.

Best wishes, I hope all goes well for you.

Is "put the wind up his sails" similar to blowing air up his arse??

Thanks Thirty shades.

Yes exactly the same, make it some super hot steaming air.

According to my psychiatrist, full recovery is possible even if people around you try to make you crazy for twenty-some years. Stay strong!

Thanks for getting my mind out of a bad space.