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#1
Aug 22, 2018, 12:12 AM
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I don't want to be a burden on anyone. I don't want to drag anybody down by telling them how bad it is. If people care about me, and they find out that I have depression, they'll try to help. They'll try to give me advice and to console me at the cost of their own joy. I don't want that. I don't want people to sacrifice their own sanity for my sake. It isn't that I'm a lost cause, either. I know that I can get better. I just don't think that they should waste their time and energy on me. There are more people who have it worse then me. They deserve the kindness of others, not me.
I don't know. I guess I'm just stupid or something. Why do I think like this? Of course, I need to let others help me, but I can't bring myself to accept it. I hate it when my logical side and my emotional side conflict. I know what needs to be done, but I don't feel good about it. |
 Anonymous32891, Fuzzybear, Hopeful Survivor, MickeyCheeky, mote.of.soul, Raindropvampire, Thirty shades
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#2
Aug 22, 2018, 12:59 AM
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You deserve that kindness just as much as the next person. But I often feel the same as you and that I don't want to bring others down. Maybe we shouldn't look at it as bringing them down but them lifting us up?
__________________
I think I need help 'cause I'm drowning in myself. It's sinking in, I can't pretend that I ain't been through hell. I think I need help---Papa Roach |
| Thirty shades
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 mote.of.soul
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#3
Aug 22, 2018, 01:14 AM
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I totally understand what you mean. I’ve distanced myself from my closest friends because I felt like I’m sick of myself, why should I put it on others. Who wants to hang with the downer. I also am very private with my emotions. Only recently, very recently, I realized I’m not just doing wrong to myself, but to them as well. These are people I love. If they choose to stand by me what right do I have to tell them they can’t. Now in 2 weeks I opened my door twice with surprisingly unexpected results. I felt better. And enjoyed the company and was reminded that I’m still a real person.
Everyone deserves kindness...until they don’t. Maybe you should let them decide if you’re worth it and not make decisions for other people. Just a different perspective. Sometimes you have to take a risk and let someone in. I’m glad you know you can get better...I think so too.
__________________
I became insane, with long intervals of horrible sanity." - Edgar Allan Poe |
| Hopeful Survivor, mote.of.soul, Thirty shades
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| mote.of.soul
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#4
Aug 22, 2018, 03:04 AM
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You do deserve people to care about you, Chez, I for one on this forum care about you
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| Thirty shades
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| mote.of.soul
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#5
Aug 22, 2018, 03:06 AM
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You're not a burden to us, Chez
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| Thirty shades
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| mote.of.soul
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#6
Aug 22, 2018, 09:59 AM
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What is a “burden”? It’s a construct that uncaring people use to describe others who are in distress... who the person does not adequately care about usually.. and who they wish to put down to make their own “weak” ego feel better..
 A few other examples - “weak”.. “failure” - you get the idea.
__________________
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| Thirty shades
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| mote.of.soul, Thirty shades
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| Reply |
This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
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