[Humpty Dumpty]

You can call these reasons or excuses. Often times that's a distinction without a difference. I'm posting this here because I think (I could be wrong) that there would be people here who could understand.
1. I couldn't remember to take it on a daily basis. Before I decided to give up it had been 3 days since I last remembered to take it & my daily pill box was empty.

2. It wasn't that important to me. Obviously if it was important I would have done a better job of remembering.

3. I didn't like the way it made me feel. The whole time I was on it my anxiety was constantly around a 7 unless it would spike. I had nothing to anxious about either.

4. My mood swings were much greater. (Kinda goes with 3) I have never dealt with mania, but I more often had "highs" I couldn't control.

5. After not self harming for around a year I started again.

Now that I have stopped taking my medication I am no longer dealing with many of the problems. So I guess in the end it's worth it.

[MickeyCheeky]

I'm so sorry Meds haven't been working out for you, Humpty Dumpty! I DO believe that differen methods work for different people and that NO ONE should have to take Meds if they don't want you! If you DO feel better without Meds, then GOOD FOR YOU! I'm REALLY HAPPY FOR YOU! Please just remember to take GREAT care of yourself in any way that you can, ok? YOU MATTER AND YOU'RE IMPORTANT, HUMPTY DUMPTY! I hope things will get better soon for you, Humpty Dumpty! Just remember to take GREAT care of yourself and to just try to do YOUR BEST! That's ALL we humans can do after all and it's ALWAYS MORE THAN ENOUGH! Sending many hugs to you, Humpty Dumpty!

[Fuzzybear]

(((((((((( Humpty Dumpty ))))))))))

Just sending hugs

[speckofdust]

I'm sure you'll find lots of people who can relate to your situation, HD! I know I can! Do what feels right for you!

[Thirty shades]

I do understand HD.

Life can be enough of a challenge, so doing what we feel is right for us, is the best thing we can do.

[Humpty Dumpty]

Thanks everyone. I think I may have given off the wrong impression. It's not that I feel "better" not taking the medication I just feel more like "me" I guess. It's the lesser of 2 evils. I have resigned to the fact that this is what I deserve. If I want to feel better I would make myself feel better.

I hope this makes sense.

[Crypts_Of_The_Mind]

Originally Posted by Humpty Dumpty

Thanks everyone. I think I may have given off the wrong impression. It's not that I feel "better" not taking the medication I just feel more like "me" I guess. It's the lesser of 2 evils. I have resigned to the fact that this is what I deserve. If I want to feel better I would make myself feel better.

I hope this makes sense.

I do not take pharmaceutical meds either - although I will at times do more natural things. I do agree pharmaceuticals tended to give more side effects than beneficial results - and it seemed docs wanted to give more meds to counteract the side effects too .. until I felt like someone I no longer recognized n sometimes found it hard to think at all. Being without meds (for years now) has brought me more to my true self, yes. Just like with anything else though, it does take effort if I wish to control those things which bother me mentally, psychologically, and/or emotionally. Thats why (I believe) medication has been preached (and sold) to us so often - because learning the unique natural methods each unique person needs to use in order to help themselves is much more complex and less profitable (to the wallet) than simply swallowing a pill that is said to work for everyone that fits a certain set of circumstances. All that said - no matter if you choose to do the work or not (to make yourself better), does not mean you "deserve" an illness or disorder anymore than another person who chooses not to undergo treatment "deserves" cancer. It is simply a circumstance you either choose to deal with or not. It sounds like you are judging yourself harshly for deciding not to deal with your circumstance. You may want to think about reconsidering your decision .. or perhaps just allow yourself more freedom to be you. Either way, you DO deserve to be as happy as you can be - that will start with how you treat yourself.