bah

GMTA. Great minds think alike. I've got a friend telling me the exact same thing on MSN right now.

You're pretty awesome, thanks (((((((((((Melanie))))))))))))))

I am sorry...I guess I have time to nit pick and moggles isnt here to pick on...I am still hurting...forgive me.

I wasnt trying to be negative or forceful.

More bodies means more heat hehe...wouldnt be so bad now would it!!

Again, I am sorry...

Why in the world are you sorry? I was thanking you! Foreceful is something I need... but I don't see your post being that mean. You are not.

((((((((((Hugs))))))))))))))

Well, I suppose you are not the nicest person to be around right now, but just dig somewhere in your mind what you already know: this is part of an illness named depression. That is why you are iin this forum, or not?
So don't exaggerate your control and responsibility: this is not you. Come on, how could you scream at puppies! Clearly this is NOT Christina, it's a mood disorder acting out.

Hey! I noticed you are competing again for the Most Loathsome Depressed Person of the year!What did i tell you?
Stop that! It's too hard a race, since ALL depressed think that of themselves.

Come on, sit and breath

((((((( christina ))))))))
just by your wishing you were a better person and worrying that you aren't...means you ARE!! most people don't even think about it like you are.

i hope you get that!!!

I dont normally scream at my babies, true. Stupid depression. But at the same tjme - antidepresants are supposed to help, so shouldnt I be better than this?

Sigh.

No competing from me. I'm sorry. Maybe.

(((((((stefano)))))))))

Look obviously you had something to say to get resentment from other people or just resent yourself (which you shouldn't). You've spoken your mind (weather it was peaceful or chaotic) is besides the point. Sometimes you have to let rage get your point across. If others have a problem with it then that's their problem. I myself have made it perfectly clear about how I am towards other family members and will break before I bend to indulge them. I don't know the specifics of what happened exactly. But what you should understand is that our true emotions hardly ever come out at the right time.. If they did then the world would be a better place. Instead most people just keep our mouths shut until they explode. Not a healthy thing to do.
Sure, you might feel a great deal of guilt or grief. But maybe that's just what people want to see.
Hold your head up high and shake it off. Every person has the right to say what's on their mind, no matter who it pisses off!

LOL You thanking me post wasnt up when I posted...someone said same thing? OK, now i feel really stupid cause i am crying adn laughing...UGHHHHHHHH Just shoot me already...melanie

Interesting thought... I guess I have to mull that over a bit...

((((((((((((Susan))))))))))))) thanks

You're definetely right about the exploding thing. Sigh. I just need to sit my family down and explain things to them. I guess sooner rather than later.

I just hate being angry/mean etc. Not a nice emotion for me to express.

Thanks (((((((((Sultrysorrow))))))))))))

(((((((((((Melanie))))))))))))) no shooting ya, sorry.

Someone did say the same thing, yes indeedy. So, good advice!

i just meant that with your concern shows a caring person worried about whether they are a good person or not...and just pondering that shows such sensitivity and thoughtfulness.

why do us sensitive types always suffer so and beat ourselves up so much??? i can tell you have a big heart

I know you definetely do. You've made quite a difference here on the forums I've seen.

Beating yourself up is something I'm good at. Can we have a competition? Or just declare me winner overall. lol

thanks ((((((((((Susan))))))))))))

LOL I dunno why that pleases me. It feels like validation and I am now not crying and feeling level again...grrrr to the not shooting...To top it all off I now have a pressure on my chest and persistent cough...hope it isn't gonna turn into bronchitis...just all I need right now...maybe being sick is the mood swings??? Naw we all know the amitriptyline and carbamazepine mess with your head. My Dad apparently nailed it on head adn mom was arguing moot point in that I didnt know how much they HELPED me. I didnt know the depth... I am learning the hard way...I'm from the school of hard knocks...anyone else?? lol

melanie

(((((((((((Christina)))))))
I'm sorry I didn't see this until just now .. Are you ok? You are none of those things that you said above. You are a wonderful and beautiful girl who is SO loved - even if you don't believe it. No one is perfect, your family included... so stop being so hard on yourself!
You know how to get a hold of me if you'd like... I can get on the internet at nights for the next little while, so I will be checking my emails...
Hope you're ok...

Christina is being emo, no need to feel sorry. Thanks my lovely friend.

(((((((((((Jacq))))))))))))))

ok ok... i bet i can beat myself up more than you can!!
nah nah nah nah nah

lol

awwwww i'm sorry you feel so down on yourself...
sometimes it feels all you do is negative to other people but keep going i dont think you're horrid, you'd be horrid if you laughed at those dogs responses, like "haha your afraid of me and now i'm going to make you even more scared"
rather you feel REALLY bad for what happened, and really. baby animals can get so annoying

yepper you do suck..........
S weet
U nderstanding
C uddley
K ind
these are things I see about you
Love ya
Angie

((((((((turquoisesea)))))))))))

pretty name thank you... my "babies" can sometimes be fairly annoying, but I think I was at the end of my rope. thanks

((((((((((((Angie))))))))))))))

AWW. That is undeniably extremely sweet of you. You're fantastic, you know that? Thanks