heading back

I think I am going to be heading back into assisted living again, my depression seems like it has been getting worse. I don't know if I really should live on my own at this point in time. I feel more secure there. I mean I know I am only 21 but it really doesn't matter right? Am I just a big failure?

I'm not really in a position to talk, I don't think, but a couple of things warrant responses, if it helps. I live with my parents (I'm 26), in a place where I have no friends and no job. I often wonder if I'm a failure, or worse, if I'm somehow a disappointment to those who care about me. Logically, I know I'm not a "failure", but that doesn't really help when trying to sleep, or just get through the day. The other thing is that being in assisted living, or in my case, being taken care of by family, has a pretty heavy stigma; you're never going to get better without taking responsibility for yourself. As much as I actually believe that that's true - that taking care of yourself and proving the promise of your own potential is either a cause or effect of good self-image - it's still a difficult thing to just wake up and accept, especially for those of us who are sick.

I'm assuming here that this assisted living isn't for suicide watch, and is just a way to get through the reality of life, and commend you for recognizing your own symptoms and having a plan to move forward. Best of luck to you.

Excellent post Pseudonym. I second it.

Cyran0

i think listening to what 'the inner voice of wisdom' says is worth paying attention to Jennifer..

Pseudonym gives a good perspective imo.... you'll know whats right i think... if you're wrong, its good to have faith i think that the care providers would advise you otherwise...

recovery is a growing thing so, a short stay might be recommended and then a safe return to 'out here' ..

i wish you the best...

gather resources, get opinions...

Thank you so much for your replies. I am really confused though. I am thinking that it is the best thing for me. But after talking to my landlord he is not so willing to let me out of my lease. But then again, I talked to someone and they said that when moving to assisted living or other kind of facility they cannot hold me liable for the rest of the rent during that period. I guess in moving to assisted living, I will be able to break my lease, but I won't be able to recieve housing assistance for 3 years. But I guess that is ok though too. I am actually thinking that I am going to remain here in the assisted living while I finish my education. that way I have less stress and less worry going on in my life. I think this is the best plan I have come up with for myself. I am hoping that I will be able to do what I have planned. I actually am at the point that I was considering checking myself into the hospital because I am feeling so depressed. I am not completely suicidal, but have had thoughts of harming myself, though I did that on Monday. I am really just at another point in my life where I need some extra assistance.

Jennifer

i think it sounds like good quiet time, reflection and getting 'your feet under' you again time.... sounds very hopeful for you....

your thinking process sounds rational, balanced and calm to me....

((((((jenn)))))))))))))
I think you are just making your way in the world
self care is important

Hya hun,

It doesnt matter if your only 21 or if your 55, if your feeling unwell and if you THINK assisted living would help, then do it. Dont think that your a failure, because your far from that. It seems to me that if your acutally doing something about it, your making positive steps towards it all and that shows strength. Knowing that you need to help yourself is the first step to recovery. Dont be embarassed about it Jennifer, theres no need to be

Anytime u need to PM me, feel free to do so, even if its for the slightest thing

take care babyg xxx