[jmb221]

Does anyone ever get better from depression? Or is this just something we'll have to deal with our whole lives? I mean, is there ever a time where you don't need to go get "tune ups?" That's what my family calls it when the meds aren't working quite right anymore or something happened in life that brings the depression back. You go to the psychiatrist/counselor for a "tune up." And how do you know if you're better? Can you ever say "cured?" I'm so tired of this hanging over me all the time. And I'm scared out of my mind that I'm not going to be happy at my sister's shower Sat. and everyone's going to know that I'm miserable and then that makes the whole event miserable. Oh good grief. How much more could I bring on myself?

[RozG]

Hi jmb

Yes imo people can get better with the right combination of meds, good counselling and a good strong support network. You have to be willing to put in the work though and be open to suggestions.

As regards your sister's shower...i know this is hard advice to follow but try not to worry about it coz the more you worry the more likely things are to go wrong.

And i know somebody else will come in with better advice for you so don't worry that this advice isn't much.

Take care and hang in there.

[Pseudonym]

jmb, I don't have a lot to say except, yes, I do think people get better. I can't say if it's because I HAVE to believe it or not, only that I do. I've been "cured" 4 or 5 times already. =)

About the sister's shower. Please don't take this the wrong way but KJ is totally right. Not worrying about it is the best thing, but part of the paranoia that accompanies depression makes it difficult to recognize how much or how little effect you have on people around you. In this case, it could be quite little. I've gone to parties, and on the way home, apologized for being morose, to which the response is usually "huh? didn't notice". Or, depending on the crowd, you could have the potential and do what you fear, so my advice would be, again, KJ's. Pretend you're having a good time, even if you aren't, and at least you won't feel meta-depression about being depressed. Will yourself into it and maybe it won't be better (it might, too), but you can say you did the right thing for your sister, and that feels _very_ good.

PM if you need to, and welcome. =)

[jmb221]

THANKS to both of you. After I read what I posted, I kept thinking, "Wow. How selfish can you be? The shower IS NOT ABOUT YOU." Thanks for helping me get my head straight. At least temporarily. ;-)

[puckyjan56]

can you go out and buy a "wow" dress or pants set. a little sparkle might help too. pj56xxoo

[Pseudonym]

I'm impressed you could even make sense of what I wrote. I just re-read it and it looks like my 1,000 monkeys were drunk.

Hold on to what you're feeling now. Good luck! =)

[trippinmickey]

I think you can get better but never cured .I feel 10x better then i did but I still get Dep. well it sucks big time With meds and treatment it has not last. %#@&#! every body its how you feel that matters if you are Dep. so be it you cant help it .Trying to be happy for other people will kill you .Its like a wave you have to ride it out to get off if you fight it you will get tired and have a harder time getting off or sink to the bottom (R.I.P).

[RozG]

jmb, you know i truly believe people can get better from depression...and from my own personal experience it's when you DON'T fight that you sink. here for you any time. hope all is good with you but you know just post or pm if not.

[lostinwilderness]

Hello jmb, I don't know about if it gets better or not but it is my personal hope that eventually it will go away. But for now I've learned to enjoy my ups and to prolong them a little bit.

About your sister's shower... I've been to an engagement party and two weddings when I was extremely depressed and I couldn't even walk without pain back then. (Weddings are a two day affair for us.) On the second day of my cousin's wedding, I was in so much pain that I took the meds without a sufficient food intake and had to excuse myself for the rest of it. She never held it against me.

Its just something about the atmosphere when you are there among all those people, a little of it infects even yourself. Even if you don't talk much or participate much, just being there is enough to make your sister happy, even if its only for a little while. She knows that you're having problems and that you've come despite of that will mean a great deal to her. That itself will make you happier.

Keep a calm head and when you get there you'll cheer up a little even without realizing it.

[littlerose]

I understand how you feel. I often don't go to functions when I get that "feeling" I'm going to lose it. I missed mother's day last year and my mom is 85!. I'd like to think it does get better, at least not worse. If I can get a tune up I consider myself lucky because I can't fully explain how i feel of make a professional understand. Somedays I think I am doing great and someone says how ya doing (only for conversation) and I begin to cry. The best part is when they ask"what's wrong?) What do you say? Where do you begin? and why does something have to BE wrong? I just feel this way right now. WOW... I guess I got that off my chest. I hope you at least know someone understands even if I don't have THE answer.

Good Luck Saturday

Rose

[wisewoman]

I seldom come here though it used to be where I haunted. I think depression lefts for some people maybe for ever, maybe for a while. It does not need to be a state of being. It can change so the hard stuff is still hard but you get through it. I hope you can continue getting through and find peace.

[Fuzzybear]