[lbilo001]

I'm not sure if I have depression. but i think that i might. I came to this site to try and figure it out without going to counseling. I know that there must be something wrong with me to make me feel this way. But I don't know.
I feel as if all of my friends just don't have time for me and they don't take anything I say or feel seriously. When I first told one of my friends that i felt as if no one cared about me, she took offense to it, and then yelled at me that she cared and basically told me that I was dumb for feeling this way. i feel like if I were to talk to a counselor for it they would just tell me that I am wasting their time and that I am fine.
Over the past several weeks i have just been breaking down and crying when no one is around. and I really just don't know anymore. I guess, all I really need, is someone who will just listen to me with out judging me. and i know that counseling would offer that, but I'm just scared to go to counseling.

[gimmeice]

(((((((((((( lbilo ))))))))))))) I don't think that a counselor would tell you that you were wasting their time and if they did then they shouldn't be a counselor. I think that the fear that you are explaining is pretty common. I am sorry that you are having a hard time right now, post here as much as you need, I hope that things get better for you soon.

[ScaredSad]

Well, I can't guess what a counselor would tell you in response to your story... but rest assured, if they do tell you that you are a waste of their time, you don't need to be seeing them anyway... and counselors are a dime a dozen (trust me on that one) and you can keep looking until you find one who is a good match for you.

I think everyone feels that way about their friends sometimes... but if it's to a point where you are unable to see any of them as supportive any of the time, then there might be some reason that you are blocking that out of your life. Whether it's because they aren't able to give you as much as you need or because you are ignoring what they do offer because it scares you to accept help, there could be a billion reasons for the strain on your relationships right now.

Sometimes, friendships end because the give and take isn't healthy. If you are in relationships where you are being drained for the other person and they are offering nothing in return, it's best to walk away to reduce further damage... but it doesn't sound like that's what's happening here... so you probably have time to repair your relationship with the chica who yelled and get things back to a happy place where you feel comfortable sharing soon.

If you have the resource available to you, seeking a counselor would be a good idea. If you are in school, most public schools will have school social workers and school counselors available through a teacher referral. You don't have to give specifics, just say that you'd like to speak to a counselor or social worker. If you have insurance, you can make an appt with a private practitioner for an evaluation. If you are in college, almost all schools have a college counseling center where students can speak to someone for free for the duration of their college career. If you are in the world without insurance and without access to academic based services, there could be indigent funds within your state that would pay for you to see a counselor and/or psychiatrist. Money is tight right now, across the nation, and my state's funds were almost entirely cut about 6 months ago so I can't promsie you that this will be available... but it's worth a shot for looking into....

Good luck with things, stay strong, and thank you for sharing this with us, you have no idea how much it helps me to be able to connect right now.